Oh brother
by totem
Summary: Preview into the wonderful world of a ... what if? Well what if there was a brother, a son of the Matthews...UPDATED!take a look RandR
1. Preview

**Preview – Introducing RICK  
**  
Okay guys here is the deal you know them nagging 'what ifs?' that we all get, well here is mine. What if Prue never died but they found out about Paige anyway, but hold up, that's not it, What if Paige came with strings attached?  
  
I do not know about you guys but, did the writers of Charmed take the easy way out or what? I mean it's as if Paige had no life before she found her sisters. No friends, and we know nothing of her life accept she was extremely difficult and had a rough time. So I have decided since it is now obvious that the charmed writers are not going to do it. A little bit of exploration is needed.  
  
So for those of you who have made it through that extremely boring bit of nagging text aimed at the writers of charmed here is what is going on.  
  
Prue – 28

Piper – 26

Phoebe - 23

Paige-21

Rick-23  
  
**Who's Rick?**  
  
Well good question, because he doesn't know him self.  
  
Rick is Paige's brother; he was the child of the Matthew's, their son. NOT adopted, theirs. Paige was adopted when a baby, and grew up been one of the family, they did not treat her differently; they treated her as if she was there's.  
  
Rick and Paige are close, just like the three original Halliwell Sisters are, he like Prue is the oldest sibling so he, also like Prue is very protective. (Can anyone foresee a bit of a clash between the two?) Paige is his baby sister, no baby, and not at all innocent, but his sister none the less. They were so close, in school practically best friends. And after the accident this family bond along with the friendship bond grew. As did Rick's Protective nature.  
  
Well I think you all get the picture of how he and Paige are with each other but just in case try this little exercise, Imagine Prue, but as a guy who's name was Rick get rid of Piper and then imagine Phoebe, accept she's called Paige. Can you fell the love...and a huge spell of confusion? Okay, I'll some it up...these two are close.  
  
So hopefully you all get the Paige and Rick thing, so now, how about a little Rick on Rick thing...He's not that sure of who he is yet, you would think that after 24 years he would be, but he's not. This is why he is often off searching for his soul following some dream or another. The only thing that he is sure off is his family...which consists of Paige. He is a musician and artist, much like his youngest sister. He feels that it is a way of expressing himself, showing and reviling the bit of his heart and soul that he is sure of.  
  
I know that I am not the easiest person to follow but the basics are: It's like the original charmed, accept Prue is still alive, Rick is around, and very defensive...(If you ever wondered what Prue as a man would be like...well wonder no more. Just another what if answered) Now if you have the basics you are ready to read...  
  
_**Everything else will be explained as the fic progresses. Any questions, just post them in a review and I'll so my best to answer them.  
  
Tell me if you think I should continue with this?**_


	2. Introduction

**Things you need to know:**  
  
The Matthews died in a car crash, Paige, unaware of this, orbed to safety. Rick was not in the accident. Paige was in hospital after this accident...Rick by her side through it all.  
  
**The fic. starts off at this point:  
**  
Paige has moved into the Manor over three weeks ago, due to certain issues...she has known that The Halliwell trio were her sisters for over a month now.  
  
Rick, her big Bro is on a quest...to find his soul and as he put it, a balance in life. He's out travelling. He knows nothing about Paige's discovery although they talked three weeks ago, the fact she found her sisters just SLIPPED HER MIND (Yeah right)  
  
Piper IS married to Leo, but has NO children. Prue IS dating the one and only Jack Phoebe IS dating a guy called Jason...(need I say more) oh yeah Paige is dating Richard, but the circumstance is different...no evil family feud...Just a normal guy that Paige met while working in Piper's bar, one night...A favour...she still works at the Social services but she works behind the bar at P3 some nights.  
  
Anything I may have forgot feel free to ask and I'll answer... By the way Reviews help...HELP a lot. So please do not be afraid to give them. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITIZM welcome.

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Disclaimer: I do not own Charmed (I wish) nor am I in any way connected with the cast, crew or writers. I do not have contacts with Spelling, Combs, Milano, McGowan or Doherty. I write simple for my own entertainment, and the entertainment of other fans. Don't sue.  
  
The original characters (Those that you recognize) are the property of Spelling and I disclaim any rights to them and the show.  
  
BUT I DO CLAIM the right to RICK... He is not the property of Spelling!

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**Thank you so much to those who reviewed:**  
  
C. C. McKenna – Thanks a lot for what you wrote – and I'll show you what I'm made of hope I don't disappoint...thanks for those great words. succubus-69 - charmedrox and ArdelleSagutcheway242 – I'm glad you like the idea...thanks for the support hope that I do not disappoint.


	3. BIG bomb

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Part one – **BIG bomb  
**  
The sun was falling into the sky; very gradually the blistering heat was beginning to turn to a still ness, the kind of still ness that was worse than the blistering heat, the kind that took your breath away, suffocating pollution added to the mugginess as the roaring cars that passed him by spat out a cloud of exhaust fumes.  
  
The air conditioning in his car did not work, it had not worked since the day he had got the car almost five months ago, 'trust me to buy second hand' he thought. At the time it seemed like a good idea, save a few pounds to buy himself a decent sound system, but it was only now he wished that the sound system, that by the way was not so decent did not top the list of priorities the day he set out to buy the car.  
  
His acoustic thrown in the back, his car holding everything that he owned, this is how he lived, he liked it, no strings to hold him down just him, and the open road. Where ever he would take himself FREEDOM.  
  
As his car continued to chug down the interstate he came to a sign, 'San Francisco – 10 miles' a small smile crept across his rugged yet handsome face. Slightly unshaven, and his dark longish hair fell gently over his face. His eyes, deep brown showed such emotion, such depth, such pain.  
  
He lent across onto the passenger seat of his car, picking up his small mobile, flipping it open he dialled a number and waited...  
  
Paige was sat at the kitchen table flipping through papers and files, submerged in a mountain of text she was only recognizable by the fiery red hair. "Hay Paige, What are you doing?" Piper spoke as she walked into the room, startling Paige. Paige managed to throw a burning glaring at Piper and respond quickly before returning to work, "Doing? I'm working on what may be the biggest case in my career to date and I have failed to realize that case files on such a large case do not come as singular. But my boss also failed to tell me that in the so called 'business' as he called it. Never underestimate the power of words and always expect the worst." She slammed her hand on the largest of the files, "this is the WORST" Piper pulled a 'oh dear god, why did I ask' face before walking over to the coffee machine.  
  
She returned placing a large mug of coffee in front of Paige and taking a seat at the table with a mug herself. "So bad day at work?" the older asked, "The worst" Paige spoke, "The worst thing is I have no life to actually miss so this is the only thing that I would be doing on a Thursday night" Piper had to smile, "Paige overdramatic much? You have a life, one fine piece of life if I recall. Where is Richard?" "Richard is working." Paige closed the file, "something I am not doing anymore..." "Well have you eaten?" Piper asked, "Nope, you?"  
  
"Not yet, I was going to do dinner now! What do you want?" Piper asked. Paige smiled, "How about spaghetti?" Piper smiled although they had only known Paige a while she was just like a sister she grew up with, "That I can do"  
  
Phoebe and Prue were walking down the stairs to the manor, laughing and talking. "Look all I'm saying is that all he has to do is...not orb out" Prue spoke, "I mean I wanted to talk to him" "Yeah well you just wanted to moan about something...how frustrating is it for Piper" Prue nodded, "Your right. I'm going to moan at out sis about her husband anyway" It was then that the door bell rang, "You do that..." Phoebe spoke as she walked towards the front door.  
  
Phoebe pulled open the door to see a guy, "Hay" Phoebe spoke, The guy was dressed in a white shirt and a brown leather jacked, with worn jeans and a pair of boots, lent up against the door frame, "Hay, by any chance would you know a Paige Matthews?" Phoebe nodded, "Yeah, just a in..." The guy, who now smiled in relief steeped through the door and stood in the foyer. Prue was stood behind Phoebe, the guy looked at them and smiled uncertainly, they looked so familiar.  
  
"Paige, guy at the door!" Phoebe shouted, it did not take long for both Piper and Paige to walk through, but Paige stopped in her tracks...a smile forming on her face...  
  
"You know P...you're one hard girl to find" The guy mused, "I had to ring Glen to find out where you were" Paige ran towards him, throwing his arms around her he pulled her close, "Rick...Jesus, I missed you" "You too P. It's been way too long" after a few seconds Paige stepped back, "you back?" She asked, "For a while..." Paige then turned to face her sister, she chocked, 'shit' she thought, "Erm...Rick, this is...Piper, Prue and Phoebe guys this is my brother Rick" she introduced. "Hay, so your Rick" Phoebe smiled as she out stretched her hand Rick took it, "I am. So you guys live together? What happened to the loft?" "Rick, these...there...my...sisters" Paige explained, Rick looked from Paige to the three Halliwells, "What?" He asked, "These are my sisters" Paige repeated, Rick never spoke...just looked at the others, after a few very uncomfortable moments Rick spoke, "Oh...well...that was..." "I know, a BIG bomb shell..." Rick looked down at Paige...  
  
His sister, that's what he saw, he saw the P he used to party with, protect, the P that used to need him...HIS sister. And he could not help it, his protective nature was kicking in...and it was not going to be pretty...

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Well guys - there was part 1. I'll try and update as soon as possible...please RandR. Thank for reading TOTEM


	4. Matthews or Halliwell?

And many thanks to you guys who reviewed...  
  
C. C. McKenna – wow you have so much belief in me I really hope I make this story one that you'll like and that I can be proud of. Thanks for your kind words they are such an inspiration.  
  
succubus-69 – hay, thank you so much for the advice...and I am so glad that you like the story. If there is anything else you think could help me to improve my writing I'd apretiate it. Thanks again...enjoy.  
  
ArdelleSagutcheway242 – I've never had an online stalker before...you're my very first. Lol. Glad that you like it, and thanks for the review...hope I don't disappoint with the next chap.  
  
Thanks to all who have reviewed...please tell me what you think of this chap... Thanks again...TOTEM

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**Part 2 – Matthews or Halliwell  
**  
"Your angry" Paige spoke,

"No...P why would I be angry...I mean I come back to find that my baby sister has a new family! I'm not angry" He spoke sarcastically.

"Paige...we'll give you some time...and nice to meet you" Prue spoke as she indicated for everyone to leave Paige and Rick alone.

"Thanks Prue" Paige spoke, then looked back at Rick, "Can we talk about this?" she asked,

"No, I think I'm going to just go!"

Paige was horrified at this remark, "What do you mean go? Rick, please..." Rick was torn between wanting to rip the door open and leave...Make a scene or to talk to Paige, sort this out.  
  
"P, how should I react? I mean, I can't help but feel...Replaced" He admitted.

"Rick, you know I love you with everything that I have..."

"So, why the hell did you go of looking for your...REAL FAMILY" He shouted.

"Come in and sit down. I'll get you a drink"

"A drink is not what I want, I want my old sister, her old life where everything was fucking simple" he shouted.

Paige backed up a bit... "I, I needed to know" she spoke quietly.

"Know what, that the family who abandoned you at birth had some great life... to know that they can offer you a hell of a lot more than I could." He was visibly becoming upset, and when he was upset he became angry.

* * *

"She never told him?" Phoebe asked as she walked into the kitchen and took a seat at the breakfast bar. Piper walked around back to her place at the side of the cooker facing her sisters as Prue took a seat next to Phoebe  
  
"obviously not..." Piper added,

"Well guys, you have to understand...he loves her very much, you can see that. He must feel some sense of uncertainty towards us and his place with...us." Prue spoke.

Phoebe and Piper both nodded, "yeah, and what was she meant to say, 'hay Rick, how are you? I found my birth family'" Phoebe said.

"Well I hope she's okay" Piper spoke "...do you think he'll stay for dinner?"

"I highly doubt he'll stay till the end of the convocation" Phoebe said, as they hared Rick and Paige's raised voices, flow through the manor...every part of the conversation could be hared.

* * *

"Rick, just calm down" Paige ordered as they walked into the living room, "Have a seat" she offered.

"P...I do not want a seat...I mean what the hell is this...it's not you"

"What isn't me"

"This, the whole setup. They are not your real family, not like me..."

"Rick, to me, they are..."

"I have drove fifteen hours straight to get to San Francisco, I searched for you for a god damn hour...I expected an all night drinking binge, not a sister who has found a new family"  
  
Paige now shouted, out of pure annoyance at her own screwed up life..."You knew Rick...after mom and Dad died, when I came out of that coma that I was criouse."

Rick nodded, "Yeah okay lets talk about that...Where were they? When you were in the coma. Where were they the nights you'd come home legless...high? What about when we lost everything and were living on the streets? They were here in this comfy little house, with a cat sat in front of the fire, mulling over the perfect fucking lives"  
  
Paige looked into the eyes of her older brother, "Take it down Rick"

"P...this is as low as you are going to get it...I feel a lot worse, I feel like putting my fist through my own face." Paige looked at his trembling hand.  
  
'I'm sorry' she wanted to scream it, shout it in his face. Just to get him to look at her how he used to. To get him to hug her and smile. But she realized how stupid it sounded, how could she be sorry? She was not...sure she knew that he was never going to take this well but there was no way that she could apologise.  
  
"So Paige where's mommy and Daddy?" Rick asked breaking the silence.

Paige was hurt by this, "Rick, MY mom and Dad are dead. They died in a car crash with me next to the car as it exploded. The people who gave birth to me, they are not part of my life...Patty Halliwell and Sam, they are dead. And to me they were never alive."  
  
Rick looked at his baby sister, he knew that with the last comment he had hurt her, but the truth was he had never in all his life thought that this would be something he would have to do, accept that a girl he loved, his sister would find her real family. "Why do I have to accept this?" He screamed.  
  
Paige moved forward, "Because they are part of my life now. They are my family."

"What about me P, I have nothing left?" He sounded so defeated, angry and hurt all at the same time.

"You are not losing me Rick. How can I make you see that? I love you so much"  
  
"we grew up together Paige, but I now, and only now understand that you were never happy"

Paige's eyes widened, "I was happy Rick, and if Mom and dad never died then there is no way that I would have come looking, but they did. I just needed to be sure that I was someone...I needed to understand why?"  
  
Rick's anger rose once again, "What so I'm not someone? I was not enough for you to hold onto and be someone...you needed more. Well Paige, a family that gives you up must have one goddamn hell of a reason to change you, make you forgive. So what is it? Because I sure as hell remember those nights that you'd drink, drink so much that you couldn't stand and there was not a part of you that was able function. But one thing you would always ask me was why? Why they'd leave you? Why they gave you up? You would tell me how shit that made you feel. And here you are in the middle of those people who made you feel like this, you have forgiven them. You are living with them like nothing happened." Rick moved forward towards her, "P, you told me that there was nothing that anyone could ever do to make you forgive them, well what the hell was it that made you give up your past. Did it mean that little too you? So what are you now? Halliwell or Matthews?"  
  
That was too far, that hit a nerve, Paige already felt this guilt and there was no way she needed her older brother, someone that she loved sot this out...  
  
"I am a Matthews, always have been and always will be. MY past meant everything to me. Mom, Dad and you were my everything. Don't sit there and tell me how it felt to be given away...because you where never there Rick. You always knew you were loved... There were people out there somewhere who had given me away. I was not good enough for them. That hurt like hell. But you accepted me, you loved me...mom and dad loved me. You guys have all my love, you have all my life. Don't make it sound like I have traded you in." Paige walked backwards, then swung around to face her brother again. "Rick, I was traded in so that some ones life could be made easier. Like I was nothing...given away. I meant that little to these people who I never even had a picture of. If mom and dad had given you away...you'd feel all this emotion, but you know what eventually you'd go looking. You want questions answered, questions that you would have lived with for a life time...I wanted answers. And I found my answers, My sisters...sisters that I love, who love me. Just like you love me. To feel accepted by a family who gave you away...well that makes me feel better in my self. To finally know that I am now good enough for this."  
  
"I was there Paige, all your life I have stood by your side. You shouldn't have needed anything more. I love you"

Paige nodded, "I KNOW YOU DO. So do they" Rick just looked at his sister, he saw the pain and realised this was just something that they'd have to work out...  
  
He still had so much to deal with and it'd be hard. But did he have a choice? He stepped forward and grabbed his younger sister, Pulled her in against his chest as she let the suppressed sobs fall, fall freely.  
  
"I don't want to lose you P. Please, promise me that I'll always be your big brother"

Paige eventually managed to speak to him, "Rick you'll always be my big bro...I... please understand, they are my sisters too" Rick rested his head on Paige's, "P understand this is going to be very hard for me...and I may very well be over protective...but I love you...just...give me time"  
  
Phoebe, Prue and Piper were all in the kitchen, they had all hared everything...they had know idea that this is how Paige felt. There was silence...no words could be spoken as they were all taking in the words, the harsh words spoken.  
  
Prue felt the need to walk into the room and take Paige in her own arms...but somehow she felt pushed away, like she had no right to. All in the manor felt to some degree a sense of insecurity. Felt weak.  
  
Would they manage to make it through this? Is it possible or would Paige have to choose between Matthews or Halliwell...  
  
And if so who?


	5. back in the past

**Part 3 – back in the past  
**  
Her body lay motionless. Her hands still and unclenched her eyes shut and her face blanch. He sat next to her bed, took her cold hand in his...silent tears fell as he brought her hand up to his face, placing his lips on them, he kiss her hand, a sign of hope, of willing  
  
Pulling back from the kiss he rubbed her hand on his cheek and spoke, "P...listen to me P...I know that you can hear me so...just listen. It's, It's just you and me now. Just us, mom and dad, they are gone...so P it is just you and me. Forever" He continued to break up as his hands shook. "you have to wake up, you have to open your eyes because I can not ever lose you...If I do not have you then I have nothing. I'll look after you, always no one will ever hurt you. You have me...always. Just You...you and me. No one or anything will get between us"  
  
His heart beat faster as his emotions grew rawer, "If I don't have you, then I'm nothing. You're my life. Who will I drag home in the early hours because you can not stand up? Who will I fight with over the car? Who will I go out with to the movies? Who'll be my best friend? Who?

"So you travel?" Broken from his thoughts Rick looked across the living room at a three women sat in front of him,

"Who?" he asked, still half in a dream world, It was the oldest who had spoken, but he had not quite court it.

"SO you like to travel?" Prue repeated, Rick just nodded,

"Yeah...erm, I'm sorry will you excuse me?" He asked as he stood to his feet and headed towards the kitchen.  
  
Prue looked from Rick's back as it exited the room to a very stressed looking Paige who pushed her hand through her fiery hair... she looked over at her sisters, "Sorry guys, he's a bit..."

"Don't worry, look...we will leave you guys alone, I mean, it's late so we will head up to be. If you need a place to sleep, you know where me room is"

"Thanks" Paige spoke, "Night guys, and thanks for dinner Pipe it was great." She kissed each of her sisters on the head and then started in the search of her brother.  
  
"Rick, I thought we'd sorted this? What is it?" Paige asked as she walked through the door to see her brother lent up against the door frame that lead out to the garden.

"I can not do this?" He admitted,

"Do what?" She asked, Making her way closer,

"Sit and pretend that this isn't crushing me P...I can't sit and pretend that I'm not feeling like shit."

"Why? Why do you think that I'll love you less?" she asked now as she stood behind him.

"Because...you don't need me any more" He explained, "You don't need me but..." He turned to her, "But P, I still need you. I need you to be my baby sis, to be someone that needs me to protect them. To be someone who wants me around."

Paige saw just how much that she had hurt him, not that she was surprised he was taking it like this, but she felt guilty. "Rick I still need you, I need you to be there for me, the next time I'm desperate to pick up a bottle. The next time I get dumped and I want to go out and order as much take away as possible. I'll need you to protect me, and I'll need you to still be my best friend. Nothing has changed between you and me...Nothing especially how much I love you."

Rick rested his head back on the door frame, "This was one thing that I really was not ready for" he sighed, "P, look...I'm finding this something really hard to deal with." He then took to looking into her eyes, "Do you remember the accident? While you were in that comma I was in a living hell, because there was a chance that I was going to lose you. Well I have to be honest, I'm reliving that again. I feel like I'm sat in that hospital again begging you to open your eyes."  
  
"But Rick there is one difference...my eyes are open and I'm here, I am still the same old sister...You won't lose me." She reassured. "Promise?" She spoke resting her hand on his arm. "I'm sorry this is a shock, but you will get used to it, and you'll see that it'll all be okay. You'll see that I still love you. It's because I WILL NOT choose between you all. Please just give this a chance." She was now practically begging...Rick saw this and knew that he'd end up agreeing and he wasn't up for the usual argument and fight in which he always lost.  
  
"This is one that I am not going to win Isn't not?" Rick spoke,

"Your right" She lent forward and hugged him, "I'm so sorry about tonight..."

"P I know you are...and I'm just confused so how about, I get some rest and we play catch up tomorrow?"

"Sounds great...thank you" She beamed, happy that he was ready to talk, "So there is a spear bed in my room that you can stay on..." She offered.

"Sounds great...I'll get some stuff and then well head up there"

* * *

Prue awoke early that morning to find her room empty, 'They must have sorted it out' she thought as she sleepily rose from her bed to ready herself for the shoot that she had today. She got washed and changed as she the headed down the end of the corridor. Passing Piper's door she noticed that she was already up and then walking past Phoebe's seeing the covers thrown of the bed and door flung open she came to the same conclusion  
  
As she walked into the kitchen she smiled as she saw Piper wrestling with Phoebe trying to get free from the younger death grip. It was a routine for the two middle sisters in the morning, get up, change, wash, drink, read paper, fight and go to work. As Prue looked on she noticed that Phoebe had the advantage as Piper was pinned against the counter been tickled to death.  
  
"Guys, stop!" The oldest shouted mockingly taking charge, "What have I told you about fighting in the kitchen." Prue mused at how funny it was that these twenty something year olds who could turn into four year olds in seconds and then turn back just as quick.  
  
"Quits?" Phoebe asked as she tickled her older sister,

Piper gasped for breath, "Yeah, quits? I give!" She screamed.

Accepting this she got off of Piper, "great, now next time I say I want pancakes instead of waffles you'll just comply" Both laughed and made their way respectably back to their places.  
  
Prue rolled her eyes and returned back to the section of news paper that she was reading, "All that over pancakes?" she asked, Phoebe smiled cheekily, "Yup" Piper was still too weak to answer so just smiled and continued to cook.  
  
"So how's Paige?" Piper asked as she was now able to speak, directing it at the oldest sister.

"Paige? I do not know...I have not seen her." The oldest admit as she continued to read.

Piper took that as an answer and brought a plate of pancakes over, "Breakfast?" She asked the turned, "I'm going to get the paper" Piper explained.  
  
Piper opened the front door, and as she did hared the sound of music...then her eyes connected with Rick, sat on the bonnet of his car, that was pulled up on the driveway he had his acoustic guitar placed on his lap as he strung away...his eyes clenched as the emotion ran through him.  
  
Piper couldn't help but watch, she was there for quite a while, until the music stopped, she watched as Rick lowered his head, obviously in deep thought, then he once again began to strum...but this time words accompanied the soft notes...  
  
Sweet words, that held so much emotion. His face saddened as his hands took over. Many people had sung, Piper had seen them, at the club but none of them could manage to capture such emotion. Not like him...  
  
The song stopped and Piper was still in a Daze. "Wow...that was great" She spoke, "No that was amazing" She corrected.

Rick turned to look at her, "I didn't know anyone was there" He explained as he put his guitar down.

"OH..." Piper came out of the daze, "I just came out to get the paper and you...that's great."

Rick smiled, "Thanks" Piper looked at him, "So do you want to come in for breakfast?"

"That'll be great" He smiled, but his smile turned into an evil grrn "But I'm actually on the run from..."  
  
Before he could finish the voice of the youngest could be hared, "RICK! RICK you are so dead..."


	6. birth parents…

Well u will all b glad to know that my muse has decided that she'll return, i don't know for how long but hopefull i'll be able to give you guys a few chapters.

Well here we go a few thankyous first and then

C. C. McKenna - your reviews and emails sure do help and make TOTEM v. v . v happy. SO feel free to keep them coming DUDE. Well i hope that i do not keep u waiting too long next time. Hope u like.

Paige Halliwell - Thanks for the reviews - so so sorry i made you wait. I sure hope it was worth it. Thanx.

ArdelleSagutcheway242 - Dude now i am sure glad u like this and i hope i continue not to dissapoint. Thanx for all the reviews that i have recived from u. Enjoy.

CGdancer - Glad you like it. You'll find out what Rick thinks about the whole witch thing in upcoming chapters so...keep reading. Should b a laugh. I mean...an overprotective bro, told his 'p' is a witch...can not b gd. lol

soccerstar11-5 - hay dude...u there. Hope you didn't die. I'm so so sorry that i made you wait so long. If u r still there read on...PLEASE. I'll really miss your reviews. Lol. Thanx

And anyone else who has sent reviews i thankyou v. much. Hope i have the next chap up sonner. Thanx.

**Part 4 - OVERPROTECTIVE**

As Rick entered the Haliwell manor his sister came running down the stairs, he smiled, yup that surly was his sister...and there was no way that he was going to let anyone hurt her, not this so called family, not anyone.

"Rick you turned of my alarm clock" She shouted as she ran around the room gathering her things. "What the hell is wrong with you? We are not fifteen anymore...are you trying to get me sacked"

He couldn't help but laugh. "Sorry P. I just could not help it..."

"Well I have to get to work...half an hour ago. And a huge case is up in ten minuets"

"What no breakfast?" Piper asked,

"Nope! No time." With this Paige grabbed her folders and headed for the door, "Bye guys" She called.

Once she had left Piper turned to Rick, "You turned of her alarm?" She asked, with a smile.

He shrugged, "Hay I'm her big bro...that's what I do. Annoy her."

Piper watched as Rick headed to the kitchen wondering weather the remark about, been her big brother was deliberate.

Piper had to admit, she had been a wake most of the night contemplating over this new found information. Of course she had known about Paige's brother...but she had never really thought about it that much. This guy was, to Paige, what I am to Phoebe and Prue. She thought all night about if this was all reversed and she was in Rick's shoes.

She would feel replace, on some degree any way. Although that was not intentional it was inevitable. Piper followed him into the kitchen...filled with a mixture of uncertainty and guilt.

"So you're the oldest?" Rick called across from where he was sat at the breakfast bar to where Prue was at the kitchen table. That was the first thing that he had said since he had came into the kitchen. That was a cup of coffee and a glass of milk with and apple gap.

Prue looked over, "Yeah I am, Prue...I have hared a lot about you"

Rick nodded as he lent against the counter, "See that's the funny thing in all the time that I had spoke to P, in the past few months. I have not hared one GOD damn thing about you. Now Prue I do not want to sound evil or rude here and I sure do hope that I am not blowing this hole thing out of proportion so...Seen as you, Like me are the oldest you tell me if..." HE stopped and looked from Piper to Phoebe a few times finally resting on Phoebe, "The youngest, ...Phoebe is it?"

In receiving a nod from the oldest Haliwell who had a mixture of anger and annoyance with considerate and understanding, he continued, "Well if you, I don't know...let us just say for arguments sake that you happened to be traveling, spoke to Phoebe at least three times or more a week on the phone you would expect her to tell you that you needn't bother to travel back because she found the family that had give her up at birth and has move in and everything is great and you are not needed. Tell me how I should be acting?"

That was it...WAY, WAY too far for Prue to keep her cool. She placed the paper down on the table and rose to her feet looking into Rick's eyes. Anger evident...

Phoebe also stood to her feet, "Prue" She spoke in a warning tone.

Prue just looked at the younger then back to Rick. "Listen to me, First of all WE did not abandon Paige. Our mother and Paige's father did..." Before Prue could continue Rick jumped in...

"Excuse me I don't mean to interrupt but this is something that I think you really need to understand... "Paige's mom and Dad...are dead. They died in a car crash in which she was thrown from before it erupted into flames prior to exploding." He shouted

Prue took this on but continued with just as much force "well her birth parents..."

"ABANDONED her" Rick emphasized.

"Yes, yes they did. That is my point...it was not our choice. I was Five RICK. What five year old do you know who has a say in such a huge decision. Do you think that as a person, from what you have seen of me that I would have allowed one...any of my sisters be put up for adoption? Secondly, you and Paige are not the only people who have lost a parent, I understand how tragic that must have been for you but, I also, at a young age witnessed my mother's death. I watched as my mom drowned, and I could not do a damn thing. SO I ask you please to think before shouting off at my mother. I may not agree with her giving Paige up for adoption but I sure as hell love her no less...so please show me, my sisters...and even your sister some level of respect."

Rick nodded, "Prue, I did not intentionally disrespect you, or your family. I just feel like...everything that our mother and father did is been forgotten about. I just do not want Paige to be given this...All of this...the stuff that I can not give her and not remember that her brother loves her. I'm been protective. Maybe to protective...but if you build up her hopes, and dreams and crush them then you will see just how OVERPROTECTIVE I can get."

"Rick in the time that I have known Paige I too have become protective of her. She is like a sister to me that I grew up with, I think no more, nor less of her than I do Piper or Phoebe."

"But that is just it...you did not grow up with her. I did...there were so many god damn nights that I sat with her and listened to her tell me about how unhappy she was, how lost, how unwanted she felt. Can you even begin to imagine what it feels like to be given up at birth? No. She told me how some nights how she would try and imagine what her life would have been like. What would have been different? You have no idea what it's like to here that your sister is imagining a different life. One where you don't exist well...Prue...I do. What I walked into last night, was my living hell... I am so so, SO sorry if I am not taking the feelings of you and your sisters into account..."

It was just then that Phoebe decided she had to stop this, "Okay Prue step back...Rick, back door now. Follow me" With that Piper assisted in pulling Prue back and Phoebe practically had to drag Rick out side with her...


	7. Gravestone

**Guys thank you all for the reviews and sorry again that it's taken so long. **

**CC McKenna – Thanks again as always for the reviews...I'm so sorry I have made you all wait. Things are a bit hectic around here... **

**The wonderful words just keep coming and for that I love you as a friend and reviewer. I truly do hope that you like this as I respect your opinions and am so, so grateful for your friend ship. Thanks a lot once again TOTEM.**

**CGdancer**** – Hay dude...thanks for the review. You asked if I had AIM: well I have Yahoo and MSN so if you have them leave your address in a review and i'll add you. ****I'd like to talk to you about charmed and stuff and I Hope you like this chap and I hope to have more soon. Thanks again TOTEM.**

**Paige fan**** – Hi Paige fan. I am truly grateful for the reviews and I feel honoured that you have added this to you favourites list. I'm sure that you are pissed that I left it so long to update sorry about that and I'm sure that if you wrote this chap it would be just fine. Thanks again and keep reading TOTEM**

**Succubus-69**** – Hay dude thanks a lot for the heads up about the tenses I hope that this chap is okay. Thanks for the advise though...**

**Yeah and I know what you mean about Rick I feel his pain, as I write his characters emotions I feel for him. Glad that you like the fic and Rick. Thanks for reviewing. Keep reading TOTEM**

**And anyone else who has reviewed thanks. Well read...Enjoy ... and tell me what u think. **

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**Part 5 - GRAVESTONE**

Phoebe walked out into the garden and Rick followed, she never said anything for a while she just watched as he took deep breaths and pushed his hands threw his hair. "Are you okay?" Phoebe eventually asked.

Rick turned to face her, "Yeah, I'm getting there"

Phoebe nodded, "I'm sorry about that in there. This is just..." he took a seat on the wall, "this is all getting too much"

Phoebe nodded, she understood this couldn't be easy. "I'm sorry" She offered.

Dean looked at her, "You have nothing to apologise for. And I was out of order kicking off in there like I did. Prue must think..."

"She'll get over it" Phoebe said, "I just want to make sure you are okay."

Rick looked at Phoebe, "I'm so far from okay right now. I just...this isn't how it's meant to be. I am meant to come home from travelling. I am meant to go to the loft and surprise her, then we eat take away listen to rock music and talk...like when we were kids...then we'd wake up the next day she'd ditch work and we'd go out to the beach, the bridge, our old neighbourhood. We'd explore our life, remember it all. Today P and I should be in our old town sitting out side our old house, school, and our life. We'd go visit our mom and Dad's grave side. We'd sit there for hours talking to them, to us, we'd reminisce." He looked out at the house, "But I walked into this...as soon as I knocked the door I knew that this time would be different..." Rick smiled, it was a smile filled with sadness...

"We should be playing football now. Or...at some club...instead I am here fighting with her new found family..." 

There was silence again, Phoebe walked over and sat next to him on the wall, "Rick we are not going to take her away from you. You are as much a brother to her as you ever have been..."

He shook his head, "You don't understand Phoebe, this hurts so much. But I feel like I have to smile and let Paige have this. When mom and dad died I vowed to never ever let P get hurt...If you guys hurt her Phoebe. You'll have me to deal with"

Phoebe nodded, "Your protective of her I get it. But we will not hurt her. And Rick look...we are not trying to push you away you can live in the manor with us...stay for as long as you like. Rick I'd really like it we could be friends...and I know that Piper and Prue would like that to."

"I don't know if I can do that, I can not stay in the manor with you guys because I'll end up doing this. Every chance I get...having a go at you guys and you do not deserve that. Tell Paige that I'll be in touch..." With this he stood to his feet he started to walk but then he turned back to Phoebe, "Thanks. And one day I hope we can be friends...I just...today..."

"I understand Rick. But don't walk out of here...go out, do what you have to do. What ever you need but come back tonight and talk to her. I can get this lot out of here and you talk to your sister." Rick thought a moment...

"Thanks Phoebe. Thanks a lot"

"No problem" Phoebe stood up, "I'm so sorry this is hard on you. I am. Just remember that you are always welcome in the manor...and you can talk to me if you like"

* * *

He walked down a long stretch off grass, seven hours since he spoke to Phoebe after he had argued with Prue. Each side of him was covered with gravestones. It had a peaceful sense and it was something that Rick had always here with his sister, and been together as a family. 

But today was to be so different...he felt so alone. Not just as he was stood here ever since he walked through that door, to that god damn manor into that god damn family...

He made his way down that familiar rout with a bunch of flowers clasped in one hand.

Rick was now sat with his back up against a tree, right next to him was the greave stone in which scrawled in fancy font was, 'Matthews, Loved dearly by son and daughter missed dearly by all. Taken sadly on the day of September 30th 1991.'

"Hay mom, Dad...I know that It has been a while since I came but remember that trip I was telling you about. I went...I only came back yesterday and of cause I had to be the big brother and go check on P..." he stopped and looked down at his hands, there was silence for a while, then Rick spoke again "I bet you are wondering why she's not here with me...why I'm here on my own for the first time since you died?" he twisted the ring on his finger, a silver band that Paige had given him for his 21st, "She found her birth family?" he said it fast, a quick blow was always best? Right? He was not so sure, as he said it he felt like a knife had been shoved in him and twisted. "three sisters? They are all older than her I think." Rick closed his eyes, and took a deep breath he looked at the grave stone, "Don't worry. I'm looking after her...already had a fight with the oldest..." he shook his head, "it's not working is it? I mean I'm not even reassuring myself here never mind you guys." There was another spell of silence, "truth is I'm scared, for her and myself...I just wish that I knew what to do" he took a deep breath...

"I walked out of there this morning...Pissed that Paige had found them, that she didn't even take the day off work and that I ended up wanting to make her chose. The worst thing is I'm not completely convinced that she would choose me" he stopped and thought, this hurt him deeply been unsure weather his sister loved him. "I went back to our old house again...I remembered when, Dad, you were in the garage...I remember you working on the car?" He smiled, "and mom you were calling us in for dinner. It was chilli, I remember because P asked why were having it again...for the forth time in two weeks...you told her because we like it. But it was really because Dad, you brought too much? That was the last meal that we had together. That was the last time I helped you work on your car. It was the last time that you messed up the shopping dad, and mom...it was the last time that you stuck up for him"

Rick sat in silence after talking about that memory, for a good five minuets thinking before he turned back to messing with the ring on his finger, and started once again to talk. "Then I drove around a bit and found myself at...at the high school." He smiled, "its funny how when P and I actually had to go there to get an education we did everything that we could to get away and now I am sitting in front of it voluntary. But you guys always told me that it's a good thing to remember everything and never forget. Don't give up who you are...and I have not, guys I remember the good times, bad times, the happy times and the times that I thought I would not live through but I'm here now mom Dad. We both got here...P and myself and we do owe that to you. God knows that we were not the easiest of teenagers but...you loved us."

"I know what your saying and your right" he spoke, "I shouldn't be saying all this to you guys, I should be telling P" He stopped and thought, "you'd be proud of her Dad, she stood up to me yesterday like you always told her to...and mom remember the job she was talking about last time we visited well she got it and by the looks of it she's doing really well. I have not really had a chance to talk about anything other than this damn family she has joined but...I know you'd want me to sort it out...to be there for her...me to be her Big brother and I will. I will look after her and do what Rick does best sort P out."

He stopped, "you know that I am delusional...and in this delusional world of mine that, I created as I drove around town today I realised that Prue, Piper and Phoebe are going to be evil sisters. Paige will realise and then she'll move out. Things will be how they used to be. Yeah I'm lying to myself but it's better than the alternative..."

For a while he was stuck in his own thoughts and when he came out he stood up, and then knelt directly in front of the stone..."Sorry guys I know that I have not stayed long today and I have talked about a load of mumble emotions that make no sense but...I have to go and talk to my sister, I have to tell her how I feel and I will be back. Hopefully with her next time. I know that P wants to see you...works hectic though." He leant forward and kissed the top of the stone...

"I love you guys and Mom Dad, how's about you help out a little... I mean there is three on her side I could use a bit of guidance...it I want her back I need you on my side. Don't leave me hanging Okay? Thanks" With this he adjusted the flowers before standing up and making his way back to the car.


	8. Maybe!

**Wow Totem's on fire! 2 posts in as many days GO ME! ?Totem looks around nervously, turning an interesting shade of red as she makes sure that no one saw the victory dance. Looks like i'm clear. LOL.**

**Well guys i think that you all deserve this...it is like a little preasent from Totem to say thanks for been great. I have made you wait and for that i'm sorry. Will you forgive me? I hope in the future i'll have posts up faster. Take chapter 6 as a peace offering. TOtem offers all readers a box rapped up with a nice ribon...inside is chapter 6.**

**Okay i addmit to drinking _WAY WAY WAY _too much cafine. Oh well...I'll shut up and let you read...but first...**

**A BIG THANKS TO:**

**CC McKenna - Dude as always thanks alot...have i made CC happy? And you really reasured me because i was not sure if he fitted the charecter ... But i really am starting to like writing for RICK AND PAIGE. I'm glad that you like it! TOTEM**

**Succubus-69**** - HAy 69, thanks for the review. They help me write...and continue. KNowing that you guys enjoy what i'm writing. Thanks. And yeah i liked Rick at the grave stone it was touching. SNIFF....TEAR Thanks anyway. TOTEM**

****

**okay guys enjoy!?! And tell me what u think... TOTEM**

**

* * *

**

**Part 6 - Maybe!** ****

Paige got out of her car and walked towards the manor, she noticed that Rick's car was not there, but everyone else seemed to be. As she pushed the door open she was greeted by the sweet smell of Piper's cooking, walking through she then heard what sounded like the distant shouts of a famous Prue/Phoebe argument.

As she silently made her way around the ground floor of the manor she heared her name been shouted, she stooped now she was out side of the kitchen door. Leant up against the door frame she rested her head back and listened.

Prue banged her hand on the table, "Phoebe, you know as well as I do that Rick hates us. I know it's hard for him but he just does not want to hear me out. You saw us this morning...the things he said."

"Prue he is hurting for gods sake, he just needs time. If you were him you would handle this no different so just step back a bit. He's a great guy, he loves Paige...you and I can both see that so just give him a chance."

Prue pushed her hands through her hair, "Phoebe I gave him a chance...this morning he decided to have it out with me and he ..."

"For god sake Prue he is hurting, back off a bit" Phoebe spoke, "Look Paige and Rick are brother and Sister. We all knew that she had a brother...we all knew it was going to be hard...all that I am asking you to do is back off a bit. Step down from been the big sister and let them two work it out for themselves. Let them find out how to deal."

"It's hard Phoebe. Paige is just as much my sister as you and Piper, I love you all the same. I can not take a back seat."

"Well Prue you are going to have to" Phoebe sighed, "I mean, he took us just been her sisters bad what about the whole witch thing?" Prue nodded, "Yeah, I foresee a load of arguments...and shouting...and that is going to hurt Paige and Rick and that hurts me. That there is nothing we can do. We can not do anything to help them both..."

* * *

Sure Paige had thought about the whole witch thing but she had managed to push it away...to the back of her mind. Hearing Prue and Phoebe talk about it made it all the more real though . There words were so...hurtful. The reality of this situation hit her hard.

Not making a sound not ready to face anyone she made her way up the stairs and towards her room. Things were all getting to much...as she walked in she saw it, lying on the side of the bed. Making her way towards it she lifted it into her arms. So long she had been with out it but it felt so right.

SO NATURAL. Her hand found it's way to the neck and her other hand the base she threw the strap over her shoulder and allowed her emotion to run through. Her hand taking over as it strummed at the guitar allowing music to fill the room...she soon followed as her eyes closed and her voice let go...

Paige's eyes welled up with tears as all her emotions surfaced. All she wanted was to have her brother look at her like he used to not like there was something missing. Prue and him were already fighting and, her sisters were right how would he take to her been a witch?

* * *

Rick pulled up to the house he saw that all the Halliwell's were home and his sister...it was pretty late now. About eight thirty, he had hoped that the others had somewhere to be...obviously not and Phoebe had failed in clearing the house out. He stepped from the car pulling himself together making sure that he got his emotions in check.

He walked up the front steps to the manor and opened the door, he hared convocation from the kitchen going on, and someone in the living room. He made his way through, looking around into the living room he saw the 't bring him self to talk to her so he continued through to the kitchen.

As he walked in he scanned hoping that Paige was there, and she was sat on at the kitchen island, Piper behind the cooker and Phoebe across sat on the counter top. "Hay Rick" Phoebe called.

"Hay guys"

"Rick you'll stay for dinner right?"

Rick looked at her, "Sure, as long as it isn't any trouble."

Piper smiled, "Not at all. It'll be ready in a few minuets." She explained. Rick gave her a thank full smile. "Okay thanks I'll just be in the dinning room" With this he turned and started to walk away.

"Rick is everything okay?" Paige asked as she stood up, she sounded very worried.

"P I just had a really long day...I'm fine" He spoke a little too harshly, he noticed as Paige's face registered hurt, "P I'm sorry just...I'm a bit wound up" Paige nodded "I'll talk to you latter?" He asked.

"Sure" Paige said as she took her seat. Rick knew that he'd hurt her but to be honest no one in this house could be hurting as much as him. ]

"Sorry" He offered before turning and leaving again.

Once he was in the dinning room he let out a breath as he took a seat on the window sill he took the wallet from his pocket, flipping it open he took from it a warn picture not much bigger than his palm. He moved his finger across the four people. He remembered that day...

He wasn't to keen on getting the photo taken but who is when you have just had a sports match especially when it was one you lost. It's not really something that you want to remember is it. Especially when it's your sisters boyfriend that beats you. Well now as he looked at that Picture it reminded him of so much more. That one, still shot of himself with his family meant so much. Held so much, it held a time when his family was happy, a time when his mom and Dad were around. This was a time when he could just be the kid...or the unruly teenager. This was a time before he was forced into the position of been the head of the family. Well that's what him self and Paige were after the accident they were a family. Just the two of them.

Sure there were night's he lay awake, he'd watch his sister sleep, night's that he would wonder...wonder what it was like for Paige. Or if he would be enough to hold them together obviously he wasn't. She came her to this god forsaken manor. It didn't help that the Halliwell sisters were been nice to him. He wished that he had a reason to truly hate them. To truly have a selfless reason for him not wanting Paige to be with them but...truthfully he was been selfish. Sure there was the aspect of Paige not getting hurt by them letting her down or something along those lines but what made things worse was that there was no doubt that they cared for her. He was been selfish not wanting her to be here with them but, he could not help it.

How long had they known her? Not long and they had formed what it has taken a life time for me to get...a bond. For that he resented the whole lot of them, he resented Paige.

He just stared absently at the Photo as if willing it back, willing that time in his life back so he could return to it. Where everything was simple. It would not return and from the moment that he stepped into the manor last night things would never be simple again.

Little did he know that things could get a lot worse

Paige walked into the dinning room and lay out plates, she set six places... Rick noticed this. "P...I know that you were never good at math but...me, one...you, two...and your family, three...that's five places why are you setting six?" Maybe it was harsh...his words. But he didn't know how else to act.

Paige was hurt by his words...but let them pass, "Leo is home...he is, Piper's husband"

"Oh so P has another brother! Your one big happy family hay."

"Rick can we just make it through dinner, just dinner is all I ask. Where you are civil to them. Is that too much?" she was begging now. Rick just took a deep breath, "Please just try" Was the last thing she said before leaving.

Little did she know that Rick was trying, trying not to totally lose it and kick off. He was trying so, so hard. Would he be able to hang on?

Maybe Paige was asking too much...

Maybe!


	9. Sorry! Don't be

**Okay I have no idea why my muse has gone into over drive but I am not complaining because I have managed to write another chapter. GO me! Lol**

**Well I hope you like and I thank all who have read and reviewed.**

**C. C. McKenna – Dude thanks for reviewing and I don't thing she'll have to worry about the witch thing for much longer. Hope you like this post...thanks mate-y. TOTEM**

**Succubus-69 – 69 hay dude. Thanks for the review and thanks for the help with the grammar. I'll try my best to sort that out. Thanks and enjoy. TOTEM**

**Queen Isa – Thanks for the review and I hope you will not have to wait too long to find out how Rick reacts to the witch thing. Anyway keep reading and reviewing. I like to know what you think. Thanks TOTEM.**

**And anyone else who has reviewed and those who took the time to read. THANKYOU.**

TOTEM.

* * *

**Part 6 – SORRY! Don't be...**

Paige walked from the dinning room and fought against the tears. Did he know how much that this was killing her? She walked in and met eyes with Phoebe, "You okay?" She asked. Paige plastered on a smile, but because she was uncertain about her voice she just nodded. Phoebe didn't believe her but decided to leave it for now.

They all made there way to the dinning room and took there seats as Piper came in and placed the bowl in the center of the table. "Okay guys dig in" She ordered. Everyone did...

A little into the dinner, and two mentions of the lack of milk left in the fridge but an empty carton present and other convocations of such a nature the pressure was getting to Rick...

"SO Paige how was work today?" Prue asked,

Paige looked over, "Yeah, not a good subject" She spoke, "I kind of had a bad day"

"Not the only one" Rick mumbled as he put his fork on the plate. "Piper that was great thanks." He said, then he tried to stand as his emotions were proving way too much for him to handle.

Paige caught his arm, as he was half way off his seat... "I've had it" She said as she also stood, and face him, both looking into each others eyes.

"P, let go of my arm." He said,

"No, I have had enough of feeling like this. What have I done wrong? I do not deserve this"

"Neither do I" He spoke, his tone way too calm for any of them. Something big was about to happen he was aware of this. Paige was aware of this and so was all in the room. "P, let me go...let me get up from this table and walk away before I do something that I regret"

"You know what do it! Do what ever the hell you like...I have absolutely know idea what to do to make this better"

"Treat me like that same brother I was before you found your new family..." He screamed.

"I do" Paige shouted back with as much force.

"No, No you have not being. What do we usually do when I come back for traveling." Rick stopped a moment and his angry tone dropped, to a hurt one, "I'll tell you what we do...we listen to rock music...stay up all night and I talk to you about my trip, we eat take away. Then the next day...we..."

He stopped but Paige picked it up, "You went to...by your self...you..."

"I sat in front of the grave P, for the first time by my self since they died...and I swear I have never felt so alone, so empty. I drove to our old town, our house, our school...our life P."

Paige saw just how hurt Rick actually was...for the first time she saw all the pain... in his eyes. SO much Pain. "I'm sorry Rick...so sorry. I didn't mean to..."

"No! No one ever means to hurt me P but it always seems to happen." He pulled his arm away, "Sorry guys. Thanks a lot for everything you have done...but I'm going to leave, find a motel or something" Before anyone could answer he left the room. Paige fell back on the chair, she felt like someone had just punched her in the face. She had hurt him, worse than anyone else could.

"Paige..." Prue started, Paige shook her head,

"Don't. I...let him...alone...and...I...he..." Paige couldn't take anymore, she threw her chair back and ran from the room. "RICK" She shouted. All at the table looked at one another, things were bad. That they could tell.

* * *

Paige stood at the bottom of the stairs; it was over half an hour since the commotion in the dinning room and things showed no sign of being resolved. Paige was to ashamed to go up the stairs and talk to her brother, a brother that she loved with everything. The rest of the Halliwell's were staying out the way, in the kitchen talking. After what Paige had walked in on earlier that day she had no doubt as to what it was about.

She hared someone coming down the steps of the manor, she stood up and turned around so she was facing him. He had his guitar and bag over his shoulders and although he would never admit to it he had been crying. Not because he like to put up a hard front. Usually he had no trouble crying in front of Paige but...he didn't want to make this ayworse than it already was.

"Rick...please...I'm so sorry. You will never know how much I hate myself right now" Paige practically begged for his forgiveness.

Rick got to the bottom step and was now stood directly in front of Paige, only inches apart he looked deep into her eyes. Then his hand made its way towards her cheek, "Look, don't hate yourself. I don't hate you...and I have nothing to forgive you for. You have nothing to be sorry for. Your life is moving on...P I'm still living in the past. I still expect you to hang around with your big brother. I still expect us to act like teenagers. We are not teenagers anymore! You have something you have always wanted here in this house...enjoy it. Just be careful okay." He forced a sad smile, "Hay and just because they are older than you does not mean they can push you around. I taught you how to Box for a reason"

Paige did not smile, she looked like she was about to die, "Why does this feel like a goodbye...for good?" She asked.

"Not for good, I'll keep in touch. I mean we have not spoke much since I got back...but one thing that I was going to say was that I'm moving back to San Francisco. I was hoping that we'd live together but that's impossible now. Look just give me a few days then I'll call you" He also looked like death.

"No Rick, don't do this to me. I need you!" Paige was begging now, as her hands gripped around his brown leather jacket, and pulled him close. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his chest.

"Look P, I love you. That will never end. This stuff with the new found family...it's my problem and I'll have to get used to it. I mean I can not and will not lose you, and I can not and will not ask you to choose. P, P look at me" He spoke she did, "Do I look like I hate you?" She shook her head, "Do I look like I hate your family?" Paige shook her head, "That's because I do not, I'll tell you what I hate. I hate what a crappy life you have had. I hate that you have been put in this position. And I hate the people who gave you up for adoption. I just want you to be happy...with me hanging around here finding every little thing to moan about, you are not going to be happy. Prue is going to hate me more than she already does and ... life is not going to be pretty. Give me time to get it all sorted out in my head and then I'll come back and I'll treat you all how you deserve to be treated."

He hugged Paige and there was a lengthy silence until, Paige managed to choke out, "I'm sorry I never...today...with..."

"P, remember nothing to be sorry for. You have a life now that you can not just up and leave. Things have changed and I get that" He held tighter before stepping back, "I'll be in touch" HE reassured a teary eyed Paige. All she could do was nod.

He took her hand in his, and with his other took out the small picture with the Matthew's family on. He forced it into her other hand. "Just...don't forget this. Okay?" Paige looked at the photo. Then up at Rick, she threw her arms around him and let the tears fall.

"Never" She told him, "Just make sure you come back, I couldn't live with out you" She told him.

"I'd never leave you P" He spoke. "I better get out of here okay" With this he kissed the top of her head then headed towards the kitchen Paige following.

He rounded to corner and as he did everyone in there looked at him, "Hay guys, sorry for the trouble and I'll be leaving now. No doubt I'll see you all again"

"Take care Rick...and you are welcome anytime" Piper called he gave her a grateful smile.

Then he looked at Prue, "Hay look after P, or you'll have to deal with me" Prue nodded her head then Rick dropped his bag to the floor and walked over to Phoebe he put his arms around her, just a quick hug and she did the same then he spoke quietly so no one could hear... "Thanks a lot, you helped me more than you'll ever know. And I'll keep you to that offer. If I need to talk!" and with this he turned and took his bag hugging Paige for a last time before walking towards the front door.

* * *

Paige stood and watched as he took off in his car, she looked on until the car went out of sight. She fell back against the closed front door to the manor and slid to the floor. She looked at the Photo in her hands and cried.

* * *

_so guys what do you think? thanks for reading TOTEM_


	10. Seven days to hell and back

**Thanks to all who have reviewed...it has helped alot. THrough rough times i right to get through and knowing that people read helps me alot. Thanks to you all! Enjoy.**

**Seven days...to hell and back **

Maybe she was wrong? Should she have gone looking?

It's who she is though, she couldn't have helped that.

Sure if she had the choice she wished her life was simple. You know the kind of life that I am on about the... the nice house, the happy, stable family, and the happy Sunday dinners. The dog, the normal family arguments and the most in portent, all the people that she loved close to her.

All the others prior to the later were not that important, she could live with out the nice house...in the past she had, when her self and Rick were forced to live in their car or an old abandoned house, and in the worst circumstances a doorway on 5th street, the rough part of town. The happy stable family...although desired it was a plus... families are not ALWAYS happy and they are very rarely stable. And who really has the happy family Sunday dinners and the well trained dog that fetches the Paper in the morning. Very few that's for sure. So Paige Matthews could live with out all of those things...but not without having all the people in her life close to her

In the past week she had not had that...

Seven days since her brother walked out that door. Seven days of not a word...for Paige it was seven days of death. She had lost her mind, walking around the manor aimlessly. Her work literally a mess and the case truly lost. If she was thinking right then that would totally destroy her but....she wasn't....

She couldn't...

Unsure weather a week ago when he big brother...her life walked out that door, it was for good. He wouldn't answer his mobile. He wouldn't even send a letter telling her what was what. Nothing for a week...Paige's hell. What if he'd done something stupid? Like, stood on the side of a bridge. JUMPED!

'He wouldn't!' She continuously told her self... 'come on Paige pull it together this is Rick' Well if Rick wouldn't do such a thing why did the thought constantly enter her head, why did it keep entering her head. Why did she have nightmares about such a thing? Because it was possible, anything was possible.

There was a nock on the bedroom door, she shut her eyes tight and tried to block it out but who ever the hell it was didn't give up. Who ever the hell it was needed a slap that's for sure.

"Not in the mood!" Paige called out, "I'm busy" Hopping she sounded busy rather that depressed and emotionally unstable. But no such look she sounded lost and confused. Why never did she sound confident and on top of things. And this time she had not even asked for that, all she asked for was busy.

"Paige, honey can I come in?" Phoebe called. Great honey? Honey means more bad news or, 'I want to talk about the hell you call a life', or even better 'I know what your going through'

"Why? Phoebe I'm really busy" Paige tried again, hopping this time she had pulled it of.

"Nice try Paige...you are lying on your bed with your head in your hands and debating weather I want to relate to you? Or I bring bad news or, what's the last one? Oh yes, talk about your life." Paige shook her head; maybe Phoebe was not the typical older sister. Maybe...on some level she did understand? Maybe. 

"Am I right?" Phoebe asked, breaking through Paige's thoughts.

"Aren't you always? Come in..." Paige eventually caved. She was lent up against the wall near the window; in her hand she held the photo. In her eyes she held the pain, pain that know 21 year old should bear. As soon as phoebe opened the door she saw that pain...

"Honey! Jesus you look like death."

Paige looked at her sister, 'Phoebe Haliwell, not backwards in coming forward. Blunt and to the point' "Yeah well I feel like it"

Phoebe sympathised with the youngest she really did. She knew all too well what the burden of pain and hurt did to a person, finding out your husband was the source of all evil. Literally couldn't be good for a person. But thankfully she was getting over it. Now seeing her little sister going through much the same torment and Pain was crushing her...she wanted...needed to help. "I'd offer to talk but I know what it's like. Been forced to! So I'm not pushing"

Paige just nodded and turned to look out the window, a few seconds of silence and she spoke, "How about you just stay with me...and we take it from there?"

Phoebe was happy Paige was not avoiding them, in most ways although they were not responsible for giving Paige up at birth, they were the family that she was ripped from and were now the family that had put Paige in the middle. The middle of her brother and her sister's. "Sounds good to me" Phoebe spoke as she took a seat on Paige's bed with her head rested on the head board and her on leg on the bed as the other was still on the floor.

* * *

Unsure of actually how long she had been sitting there, Phoebe was starting to wonder if Paige was still with her or lost in her thoughts somewhere. But the comformation that Paige was still here was when she spoke...

"He's never walked out on me before" She said lowly, as she looked from the window to the sister that was on the bed. "I have never hurt him this bad before Phoebe. And he has never walked out on me!"

Phoebe sat forward, "He'll be back!" She said,

Paige shook her head, "You can not be sure of that"

Phoebe stood up, "I can, Paige, because I was that...honey, I was Rick. The sibling who was hurt by a sister and up and left...but I came back. It took some time Paige. But here I am back with my sister. Close to my sister. The same sister I walked out on five years ago. Maybe you don't need me here right now, and maybe I am not helping...if not tell me, and I'll shut up...but consider hearing me out"

The youngest looked at the photo in her hand, then looked at Phoebe, "...I just want it to stop. I do not want it to be this hard."

"I know honey. I know. But I want you to listen to something now. This is something that I buried a long time ago and you know nothing about but five years ago Prue was engaged to a sleazy, Armani wearing, chardonnay slugging loser. He and I did not see eye to eye mostly because I didn't trust him. This guy who my sister had an undying love for and was prepare to sacrifice everything for tried it on with me...when I turned him down, he became forceful...this happened on more than one occasion. Prue found out, and of course that no good son of a bitch turned it all around...told her that I had tried it on with him..." Phoebe was reliving past events that she had tried so hard to bury... so hard to get rid of... "Now Prue, for some reason was blinded by love...she chose to believe him. Well it was not like I had given her reason in the past to believe me but...knowing that my big sister chose some guy over me, hurt so bad. I couldn't deal so I did the one thing that Phoebe Haliwell is good at I bailed. I got as for away from here as Physically possible for me at that time. I moved 3,000 miles away to New York City. Leaving my life, my family behind. When I walked out that door, I had left Piper and Prue wondering, wondering if I would ever come back, if I'd do something stupid. If they would ever see me again. But Paige no matter how hurt I was, how angry Prue was...we got over it...we moved on. And now here we are...Sisters, friends...nothing will change what you and Rick have Paige...you have a love stronger than most, a friendship that has grown. Now no matter what he will be back...maybe today, tomorrow or maybe next week or in a years time but your brother will come back because he is your brother and not myself, Piper or Prue can change that. I want you to remember that. Nothing and nobody can change what you and Rick are or have."

Paige was close to tears, not that that had been an unusual 5thing in the past week. "I just want to know he's okay"

Paige nodded, "Sweetie, trust me. He is okay and will be back here as soon as he's sorted his head out...it's a big thing Paige. But he'll sort it out and he'll be back. I promise"

Paige returned to the Picture, "I hope you are right" She said, "because I can not lose him" Phoebe moved closer to Paige and put her arms around the youngest who gladly accepted the comfort. "I just wish that it was easy"

"Paige life isn't easy, life is what it is! Unpredictable, yes. Evil, yes. Pain filled, hell sure but it is not easy. Remember what I have told you...it may take time, but it will all work out in the end." Paige gripped tighter onto Phoebe and for the first time in a week she felt Phoebe was her life line...

They talked, cried...and Phoebe reassured Paige for hours that all would work out. Paige had been given a sense of hope. And for that she was thankful she was coming back from the dead...and hopefully stronger than ever.


	11. got it so wrong

**Guys all that I can offer is a sorry it took so long. On hell of an apology actually...hope this makes up for it. I'm kind of getting to a story line now so...YAY! I'm hoping to give you a real dramatic next few chaps...but seen as my life has turned into on hell of a confusing and complicated thing I am not sure how long they will take. Hopefully I could get one by the weekend. i'll try. Thanks anyway in advance for reading and once again, I'll start with a few words of thanks.**

**Thanks CC** – as always thank you a lot for the words of encouragement. And the muse thing not getting any better...she has gone on a silence demonstration. DAMN that little glowing sparkly person full of inspiration. Just a few words from her would help but no such look. SO if this chap is rubbish it's because the little fellow won't say a word, she needs to know how to respect those bigger than her LOL. Well tell me what u think of this.

**Succubus-69** – thanks for your support and engorgement. It really helps. I am hoping to have a lot more emotion put into the next few chaps and a story line too. Well tell me what u think and thanks.

**Thanks also to anyone I may not have mentioned or those who read and do no leave reviews thankyou so much. Tell me what u think of this chapter.**

* * *

**got it so wrong**

He walked towards the manor, he needed to see her, seven days he had thought, thought hard. He walked around the town they grew up together in, the home they had lived in, the doorways that they had slept in. Things had changed, a lot. There was a time in his past that he would have done everything to keep Paige his little sister, and now here he was funning away.

The rain had begun to fall, his hair and jacket soaked, totally drenched. His eyes held a lot of emotion. His hand clutched onto something, tight. This was the worst week of his life.

He had slept in a car for seven nights, he had used the last of his money four days ago and had truly considered up and leaving. Walking out of this hell he'd walked into.

He was at the manor now, this god damn manor that was the source of his pain. He had considered walking out, but was then overcome with such a great deal of guilt. Walking up to the manor taking a deep breath he rang the bell an waited, waited ... for what seemed like an eternity.

Then the door opened and stood in front of him was not his sister, "Rick! So you are not dead?"

"Prue is P in?"

"No, she has not got in yet. But she wont be in." She spoke,

Rick looked around nervously, "I'll wait here thanks."

"No Rick, it's raining and besides you and me...we need to have a little chat. Come in" Now Prue's voice was a growl and order.

Rick walked through the manor, "How are you?" he asked

"Me? I'm fine...but Paige is a different story." Rick lowered his head, "I messed up big time. I know that so just back off okay. I'm here to make it right."

Prue moved forward, "Rick you have no idea what you have put your sister through do you?"

"I am very sure I know how she feels and I am here to talk to OUR sister" He spoke,

Prue's eyes widened, 'did he? I think he did?'

"Rick, just make sure you do sort it out. She loves you dearly and the last week has ripped her apart."

"She isn't the only one. I totally lost it pure but I think I have figured it out now. And I'd like to apologies for my earlier behavior."

Prue nodded, "All that you have to do is make everything right with Paige. I hold nothing against you Rick. With me it's cool as soon as you and Paige make up." Prue then left a silence in the air...before speaking again, "You don't strike me as the apologetic kind of guy."

"I'm not" He admitted, "But I was wrong way out of line. Especially the way that I have treated you guys."

"Let's just forget about it. We are sound now okay" She told him, he nodded.

* * *

Paige walked up the steps to the manor and pushed open the door, she was the last to enter the manor there was now a full house, and Rick. She called out, "Guys?"

No answer for a second and then Piper called, "Kitchen"

Paige through her bag to the floor and headed in that direction. "Guys, I..." She stopped her sentence as she saw Rick sat on the counter top of the island. "You, YOU!" She shouted.

Rick jumped down, he walked towards a shell shocked Paige, "Hay P!" He tried,

"Hay P. HAY P!" She slapped his chest with each syllable she just spoke before just falling into it. He held his arms around her, "You fucking scared me. You never called or..."

"I'm sorry P, really I am. I messed up, I freaked. Sorry"

"Rick I thought you had done something stupid. Why, you...I..." words failed her as she was overcome with relief, anger and love all at once a deadly cocktail of roar emotion. She pushed him back, "How could you!" She screamed, "Were you trying to pay me back. Hurt me?"

"I'm sorry!" he tried,

"Well Jesus Rick, all in your time hay. I was so scared and you didn't even call, not me, not glen not nobody. What is your problem? Sorry, you think that'll do it?"

"I was scared P, I went crazy and I drank, a hell of a lot...just, give me another chance." He practically begged.

Paige was overcome with an emotion that canceled out the rest, LOVE. She len t forward and pulled him into her, "Don't walk out on me again. I need you Rick, I love you..."

"Always P, I'll always be around. Last week was hell, I wanted to talk to you so bad but..."

"Forget it, Past...all in the past just sort it out okay. Deal, do what ever the hell you need to do and accept this is my life. And I need you in it." She spoke sternly.

"I get that now. Really I do"

The three Halliwell sisters were watching this heart wrenching moment and then, Phoebe spoke, "Guys this is great and all you know with the..." She rose her eyes, "For use of a better phrase Brotherly love but...I haven't eaten since breakfast"

Paige smiled as did Rick...he liked these sisters of Paige's, funny was Phoebe, A hard motherly instinct Prue, and a great cook that was Piper. He felt that maybe they could be friends. That everything would be okay. He could be happy.

Little did he know. That in the Halliwell manor Happiness never lasts.

But he would soon learn. There was more to the new found sisters, friends and even his own sister who he thought he knew inside out...a lot more.


	12. CRAZY

**CRAZY**

"So have you seen Glen lately?"

"No, I haven't, I spoke to him the other day though"

"Are you to..." Before he could finish Paige knew what he was thinking,

"Very good friends"

"Okay defensive much? It's just you two are over friendly on occasion"

"Over friendly. Rick, he was my boyfriend, on occasion, you make it sound so... Wrong"

"Well it was, a guy shouldn't have his sister dating his friend"

"Rick, your friends are my friends"

Rick shrugged, "Okay, well if your not...for lack of a better term getting over friendly with Glenn then who?" He inquired, when he saw Paige look at the floor, and avoid contact he knew he was onto something

"No one" She spoke,

"Oh I think you're wrong. Tell me..."

"Rick it's no one" Paige insisted as she stood up from the kitchen table and walked over to the fridge taking out a bottle of water.

Rick also stood up and followed her, "Fine" He said, then he grabbed an arm around her neck and with the other one he reached towards the open fridge. Pulling out a bottle of tomato ketchup he aimed it at her front, "Paige, come on I know that you are lying to me"

"You can do want you like but I'm not telling you." She spoke confidently, sure that he wouldn't do it.

"Really even if I do...this" he squirted the red ketchup all on the front of her shirt and face.

"Rick" She screamed, "Rick. Let go of me" As she tried to struggle away he held his arm around her.

"Just tell me Paige. And then I'll on you know how this works."

"No Rick, let go of me. Phoebe...PIPER...SOMONE!!!" She screamed as Rick began to empty the bottle of water on Paige who was still struggling. Rick was laughing hysterically. Just as he saw Phoebe enter the kitchen he decided that this would be more affective he took the milk carton from the fridge and made a run for the new found Halliwell sister, Grabbing her arm he pulled her into him much like he had done to Paige.

"Ah, Rick what the..." Phoebe then saw Paige, who was covered in red source and soaked and noticed the milk in his hand, "NO...Rick don't you dear"

"I won't as long a P here tells me who she's got in her bed..."

Just as he said that the two oldest sisters entered the kitchen, "What's all the screaming about..."

"Prue help Phoebe..." Paige shouted, "He'll do it"

"Yeah I will, so you two better stay back and you...P you better tell me who he is"

"Paige tell him NOW!" Phoebe screamed, "Prue, Piper stop him he's crazy"

"P, your sisters need you!" Mark laughed, "What are you going to do"

"It's not going to work...I mean, Phoebe I can sacrifice..."

"PAIGE!" Phoebe screamed, 

The two oldest sisters couldn't help but smile, but Prue felt the need to intervene, "Paige maybe you should tell him"

"She's a smart one P"

"Yeah tell him" Phoebe added as she continued to try and struggle away. "Rick I swear you do that you'll pay"

"Paige tell Phoebe that in this family you do not hold a grudge" Rick spoke, "Just tell me his name and I'll let her go"

"NO!" Paige spoke sternly

"Fine have it your way."

"RICK" All of them shouted, followed by a scream from Phoebe as the chilled milk covered her hair, face and clothes, He let Phoebe go and smiled

"Ready to talk" He asked Paige.

Paige looked sympathetically at a milk soaked Phoebe, "Sorry Phoebe" She said.

"You will be" Phoebe shot at the youngest then she turned to Rick, "Richard, his names Richard and, he's coming around tonight..." Before Phoebe could say anymore paige hurled an egg at Phoebes head it smashed and caused the room to fall silent.

Piper and Prue shocked at what they saw, Paige and Phoebe having a stare off and Rick loving the whole thing. "So...he's coming tonight?"

Paige looked at Phoebe, "Huh, your no sister of mine!"

"Hay, I came to save you and you sacrificed me. You had the power to stop it..."

"Yeah well you can deal with him now when Richard comes around...okay! And you, you are going to stand up for your little sister and fight her very childish big brother"

Rick erupted into laughter, "Wow, so it's like hell meet the family"

"Richard is a great guy, he don't need none of your crap okay?" Rick flashed Paige a mischievous smile, "Rick I mean it"

"Okay, you mean it...I get it"

"See, see what you did" The youngest asked Phoebe, as both walked from the totally trashed kitchen and through towards the showers...still bickering.

* * *

Rick flashed a smile at Piper and Prue, "you crazy" Prue said,

"Yeah I am, Crazy, and a protective psycho brother." He started to clean up the mess that he had made. "So is he a good guy?"

"Who" Piper asked,

"Richard, what's his deal?"

"He's madly in love with your sister. I mean Crazy in love...He's a great guy" Prue answered, "Trust me Rick he passed the Prue's seal of approval."

"Yeah well Rick has a few tests of his own!" The brother spoke as he continued clearing up.


	13. Is he okay?

Hay guys thanks to all for the reading and reviewing, I'm sorry this has taken so long but I hope to have more up soon. THANKS AGAIN TOTEM

**IS HE OKAY?**

Rick was sat at the bar in P3, he had his hand holding his head up as he looked at the table across the room. A table where P, Phoebe, Prue and Piper were sat with there other halves.

Piper in the arms of her husband Leo, Paige in The arms of a now approved Richard, Phoebe with Jason and Prue with Jack. The whole table was happy. Laughing and shearing, one big happy family, Rick had got to know them over the past three weeks. He was living in an apartment not far from there and had come to know the club very well. He often spent the night and much of the early morning drinking in there.

Rick had played in the place a few times now, when Piper needed a guy to go live on Friday night, then after that the gigs had become more regular which he was happy about. He needed the money. Previously, before Rick came back to San Francisco, he had been travailing prior and the only money he needed was that in which he gained from odd jobs bar tending and what have you. He lived for the moment. In the moment. And the moment now was him sitting over at the bar watching how happy his sister was. He felt so out of it right then...that moment that he was living in was an uncomfortable one.

Rick signalled for the bar tender to send another beer his way. It didn't take long for him to comply and the fairly young bar tender headed over, "Hay Rick, is it a beer?"

"Yeah, thanks Billy" Rick answered as he took out his wallet.

"Rick, the family doesn't pay for drinks here" Billy explained,

Rick nodded his head an looked over to the table, which for the one hundredth time tonight, erupted into laughter, "Yeah, but I'm not family...I won't take off them" He explained slapping the money on the bar and lifting the bottle to his mouth.

"How come your sat over here Rick, when they are over there"

"Because, my dearest sister is with her boyfriend, my direst adopted Halliwell sisters are also with their other halves. I just feel kind of out of place over there." He then noticed as he looked back at the bar tender his worried glance, "Hay Billy, it's just something I go threw. I'll get over it and go over there. I'm fine...really"

"Okay then, be sure you are. And give me a shout if you need anything else" Rick nodded and watched as Billy walked over to another costumer.

Watching as his sister sat in the arms of a guy he barely knew...was strange to him. The past weeks were strange. Before, Paige had always gone out with a mutual friend. In most cases ones that they had grown up with of a guy she had met through him. Now this time his sister, was sitting with a guy that she had met threw Piper, her sister.

He had found himself thinking more and more about the train wreckage that was his life. He had nothing but that one girl that he had grown up with to become this. P and Rick, Rick and P and now it wasn't just them, she had more, while he stood with much less. Or was that the case? Was he been accepted by the family?

As he pondered on Philosophical questions such as, what was his reason for being? A topic way to deep for Rick to think of. especially after a few beers.

His hands moved across the bottle, he was thinking of heading home but didn't feel right leaving without a word. But he didn't have the strength in himself to stand up face his sister. Not in this state. Although over the weeks he was coping and even liking the Halliwell sisters it was making him think more and more about his place, not only in his sisters life, but in his own.

He couldn't sit here all night.

But it had taken over an hour to get away from that god forbidden table. It was a good hour and a half ago that he had left to 'make a call' no doubt he had been seen by them. He had better return to the table to bid a goodnight and be the perfect gentle man his parents had brought him up to be.

But what better way to get in P's good books after walking away for the night than...

Rick rose his arm, "Billy, a round for the table when you got a minuet"

"Coming up Rick." Billy called as he turned and began to collect the required drinks.

Rick played with the ring on his hand as he awaited the order. It didn't take that long for Billy to be over placing a tray down. "Okay then, it goes like this. Right to left...Piper, Phoebe, Leo, Jack, Prue, Jason, Richard and Paige" Billy explained as he pointed to the drinks.

"I think I got that..." Rick laughed slightly, then handed a twenty bill across the counter. He saw the look in Billy's eyes indicating that it wasn't necessary but Rick insisted, "...Keep the change" Rick added as he made his way with the tray towards the table.

He approached coming up behind Piper, Leo and Prue and Jack facing him the other four. "Guys..." He said placing the tray on the table leaning over those in front, "I got a round...It goes...Leo, Richard, Piper, P..." He stopped in realising he had got the order messed up. "okay looks like I can not even get an order right here so...let me start that of again. Phoebe, Leo, Jack, Prue, Jason, Richard and Paige" HE spoke placing each drink in front of the Person. He was thanked by each one then Paige spoke up.

"Hay Rick, thanks for that..." he knew that she was meaning more than just the drinks, she meant for accepting all of this. It was a big step.

"...but you messed up the order" Piper added, "You seem to have missed out a beer"

"Oh...guy I'm not joining you. The rest of the night you got to your selves. Rick's off home now. I'll see you all sometime...soon" He added. With this he turned and started to leave.

Paige stood up from Richard's arms...

"IS he okay?" Prue asked,

"Not by a long shot. I'll go talk to him." Paige explained as she headed towards where he had left.

--------------------------------------------------

"Rick! Wait up Rick" she called to him, as he walked threw the car park, she caught up with him and noticed something was off. "Rick talk to me"

"P, I'm fine really." He tried to sound fine, but he sounded off.

"Nice try! I'm your sister...I know when you lie to me. Talk...Please" Se begged.

Rick stopped walking and turned to face Paige, "It's just...the same old shit P! You have this great life now...and don't get me wrong I couldn't be happy for you but... I just have no idea where I stand anymore. Not only with you but with myself."

"Rick, you know exactly who you are. You are a great person Rick. I love you and you know that. You'll figure it out"

"Yeah, I always do" he stopped, "Look Paige it's just me thinking about mom and dad and the past. I'll get some sleep an be fine...I'll be over to see you tomorrow." He lent forward and pulled her into a hug, "now go back and have a good night"

"Rick I can not leave you like this..."

"Like what? P, I'll get a cab to my apartment. Get into bed...sleep of this head and be up bright and early to try and find the meaning of my life tomorrow..."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Paige walked back down the steps of the club, having just seen her brother get in a cab. He was acting off lately. She decided before returning to the table to have a breather so she walked towards the bar. She was only sitting by herself for moments when she hared a voice. "Hi Paige"

"Billy hi"

"Can I get you anything"

"Nah, I'm good thanks"

"Paige, I may be way out of line here, and I know this has nothing to do with me but is Rick okay? He seemed a bit, I don't know...off."

"Yeah, he's just going through a lot right now. It's this new family stuff, made him think...when he thinks nothing good happens."

"Just watch him okay Paige. Tonight he was acting strange...he wouldn't take the drinks on the house, he insisted on paying for them and...I don't know"

Paige understood then what was wrong with Rick, "I'll talk to him...sort this lot out. But right now I'm going to head off home. Thanks for looking out for Rick Billy. I owe you one"

"Anytime Paige...night"

"Night" And with that Paige headed back to the table...

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Hay Paige how is Rick?" Prue asked as she saw her sister approaching.

"Rick has something up and he wont tell me. So I am pretty worried about him. Sorry guys but I think I'm going to head home...Richard sorry about this but, I have to go"

"I'll take you home, how's that" He offered,

"Nah, your okay I have my car, and I just need a bit of thinking time. Sorry"

He stood up and kissed her on the lips, "It's okay, speak to you tomorrow?" Paige nodded, "Night guys" She spoke before turning and walking away.


	14. On the house!

**Oh brother**

Thanks for the reviews here is the next part. Leave a review and tell me what you think. Thanks guys...enjoy

Sorry i haven't had time to answer you guys who have reviewed and thank you but next chap i will promise! Thanks for all your support it reasuring to know that u acctually read it! LOL. Thanks to all. TOTEM

**CC.** - So glad you are happy. here is another chap!

**...On the house!!**

Rick walked up the steps of the Halliwell manor. It was now eleven and knew that he should make an appearance. It was now eleven and knew that he should make an appearance. Just as he walked through the door, his mobile rang. Pulling it out his pocket he continued towards the kitchen.

Just as he walked through Prue and Phoebe were in there and hared him talking, "Hay Rick" He spoke into the phone, and there was a pause the two sisters looked at him as he stood in the doorway. "Mark...where the hell you been man..." Rick's eyes instantly lit up, "...well you're not the only one. Jesus it's so good to hear from you." Rick had a mixture of shock and happiness on his face but, it faded a bit, "P? She...a lots changed in her life. Me? Pretty much the same old...me! Not such a good thing." Rick couldn't help but smile, as Mark spoke into the Phone he turned to the sisters. "No, it's a shock but P's good, big change...Great change actually. No doubt you'll find out." Rick laughed, "No MK you missed out she's with a guy already...yes it serious...no you can not...he's taking great care of her...MK lets remember P's my sister I don't need to hear or even think such things. Okay look man...me...you...meet up. Well I know a great club that belongs to..." He hesitated momentarily... "A good friend and it's the best club actually in San Francisco. Tonight...not a word to P. She'll love this" Another gap then, "Alright man, I'll see you then." With this he turned of the phone and looked at the screen taken a moment to soak up what has just happened he turned to those in the kitchen.

"Hay Rick" Phoebe said from the place where she was stood.

"Hay Phoebe, Prue. Good morning and how are you?"

"Much the same as your sister" Phoebe added

Rick, now intrigued, asked "Oh, and how would my sister be?"

"Worried about you. Are you okay Rick you seem a bit off last night"

Rick put his mobile on the side, "Halliwell's you shouldn't worry, and neither should P I am a complicated person. I am moody, and suffer greatly from odd spells of depression. I drink, I sleep, and I'm usually fine."

"You, you are trying to give me a break down are you not?" Paige's voice rang through the kitchen.

Rick swung around, "Hay P" 

"Don't you hay P me. I have decided on something next time you have one of these...these...things I do not leave you. I take you home, we talk, and you do not push me away not anymore..." Paige let out all in one breath, then she leapt forward and put her arms around him, "Are you okay?" She asked her tone softening.

"I'm good. Really, good actually." He stopped and hugged her back, "And hay, I'm the oldest...I worry about you it's how it works"

"Not when you're the one doing stupid stuff."

"Okay, I'm sorry and all that but you know what happens... I lose it. But I think that things are going to get better now. I can feel it"

"I'm glad...because after this little sister moment...you and me. Need to have a chat" Piper's voice rang as she stood in the door way.

All looked at her, Rick cocked an eye, "Well this seems like I'm in trouble! And I thought you were the calm one so if I got you angry it means that I did something to make you really pissy. And it's not good at all."

"Wow he's a fast learner" Phoebe spoke up earning a smack from Prue and a stern look. Paige stepped close to Rick, "Good look, you'll need it!"

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Rick walked out the front door followed by Piper who shut it behind them, "Walk with me Rick" She ordered, as she started off down the steps. When at the bottom Piper turned to him, "...Your with us and your sister been sisters. Yeah?" She asked

"Look it was a shock at first but, I'm cool with it now" HE spoke as he stood in front of her.

"Good. I'm glad because I have to admit it Rick. I like you! You're a great guy. One problem thought, that I will not tolerate is People who I consider part of my family paying for beer and drinks at my club" Rick pushed his hand through his hair and sighed, "Why?" Piper asked

"Because..." Rick spoke his voice slightly raised, "That's just it Pipe, I am not part of your family." He walked back and took a seat on the bonnet of his car. Piper walked over and sat next to him

"You are Paige's sister, that makes you part of my family. I hope one day you truly belive that. I will treat you like any of my sisters. You can get angry at me, argue wit me...hell, I'll even take you wrestling me to the ground but like any of my sisters I will forgive you and you ever need anything from me you come to me. Talk to me."

"Piper I appreciate all of that I truly do. But I do not want to take anything from you and your family. I feel like I'm robbing you. I know that it sounds stupid but Piper...I have worked for everything that I have ever had and It's kind of...I just can't take from you"

"What do you feel. Right now?" She asked,

Rick looked uncomfortable down at his hands, the floor and then up at the manor...that is where his view stopped, looking at the manor. "Right now?" He asked, "To be honest, lonely. Confused. Like everything I ever thought I knew fell apart and now I'm rebuilding it. I'm scared of what is a head of me..." He admitted

"What do you fear Rick...No matter what you may think we are not bad people, Paige loves you more than anything and I am, weather you like it or not, the mother of that house. I mother people...and I'm afraid that includes you so, talk to me? Trust me?" Piper said as she looked at his face, she saw sadness, but also something else, acceptance.

Piper stood up slowly and just as she was about to walk he spoke, "How do you know?" He asked

Piper looked at him, "Know what?"

"That she still loves me?" He asked, now for the first time since the convocation began making eye contact with Piper.

"Because Mark, I was the one that was sat with your sister all night as she worried about you. I was the one who made the coffee for her, talked to her. All the fear you have, Paige mirrors it. She is scared to...scared she is going to lose you."

"Maybe I should just walk away! I always seem to complicate her life..."

"Rick, you walk away then you kill her" Piper explained, "She loves you so much"

"I love her too Piper, I always have." Rick lowered his head, "I just..." He laughed, "I'm afraid that there's more she isn't telling me." He admitted.

Piper cringed inside knowing what he was been hidden from, the world of magic. He didn't know who Paige had become!

"Do you trust her?" Piper asked, Rick nodded. "Well then trust that she loves you and remember that she needs you. And Rick..." She spoke getting him to look at her... "If I hear that you pay for another drink in my club, I'll kill you and Paige will miss you then"

Rick smiled. Then he stood up...faced Piper and looked into her loving, motherly, caring eyes. He wrapped his arms around her and she him "Thank you" He spoke

"No problem Rick"

"Tonight, you take it off...a really good friend of Paige and myself is coming into town and I want you guys to meet him. Do not tell her, it's a surprise. Do not say you can not make it and this is my way of saying thank you for sorting my head out. I can not 100 confidently tell you that I may not go a little crazy again because that's just me but...I'll be okay. Thanks"

Piper smiled, "No problem Rick. No Problem and any time. Now get inside and let me feed you and my sisters a slap up lunch."

"How can I resist" He smiled

Piper hugged him again and then turned towards the house; she walked a few steps and then looked back at Rick who had not move. "You coming?" She asked

"Yeah, just...need a minuet" HE explained,

"Okay then. Don't be too long." She walked again, but stopped, "And if I tell them your okay...I wont be lying right"

"Actually you will because I'm better than okay thanks to you" He explained looking at Pipers back. She was smiling feeling a sense of achievement; she had made him feel loved and accepted. She continued and walked into the house. Rick sat back on his car bonnet and smiled to himself...looking at the house he knew that in that moment he was more than Paige's sister. He was the Halliwell's friend and maybe, someday, he'd be there brother to.


	15. Totally intoxicated

**sORRY IT HAS TAKEN SO LONG GUYS!!!**

**my life has been all over the place lately and i am finding it hard to write, and get the insperation but after listening to CREED - one last breath i wrote this. So it is not the muse you have to thanks today...because she totally deserted me lately - but the song that holds so much emotion. **

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**Thanks to all who are taken the time to read this and i hope to have more posts soon...Thanks for been tolerent of myrandom posts and i promise to give you more soon. Please tell me what you think and i'll talk and answer any questions along with my long overdue thankyous to you guys who have rviewed soon. THANKS FOR THE CO-OPeration ToTEm.**

**Oh Brother – Totally intoxicated**

Now it was at last three months since they had met and Rick was a brother to the Halliwell's as well as Paige. He ate there food, shopped for them, slept over there many nights and just about lived there. They didn't mind accept when he ate all of Phoebe's cereal or drank all of the coffee in the morning. But what was a brother for if not to get on your nerves. The truth was to one of them he was more than a brother; they were trying to get away from it. They tried to hide it from them selves but the truth was that it was not working.

Rick came through the bathroom door, a towel hooked around his neck with a pair of jeans and a brown belt. As he walked through the hallway absently humming he walked into the younger Halliwell. Steeping back after the initial shock of colliding with her he noticed that she had red rings around her eyes and her hand was shaking. "P...Phoebe are you okay?"

Phoebe took a step back and was instantly struck by his muscular body, his rouged handsomeness, his charm. She looked up from his tone body into his eyes. She hared in speak but was torn from her mind. "Phoebe? What's wrong?" He asked again genuinely worried about her.

"We...its over, Jason and I have broke up." She explained, "I..." She stopped, they once again made eye contact. Both saw the truth but once again tried to hide from it.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked, seeing Phoebe's sadness.

"Yeah, I...we talked, on the phone, the e-mail...but it wasn't enough. We did love each other but...lately we..." Phoebe was lost in her thoughts as she looked at Rick's piercing eyes, his body, his loving face. Stepping back she leant against the wall, "he was in Hong Kong...he, cheated on me...with the personal assistant."

"Phoebe...I'm...sorry! What a loser...he's no good for you Phoebe. You deserve better" Rick took a step towards her, he didn't know that he was doing it...it just happened. He was looking into her eyes. "You deserve someone who truly loves you..."

'Jesus' he thought, 'what the hell is wrong with me, it's like a disease' it had been like this since the night they had gone to the club, Jason had stood her up then and he had been there to comfort her. Ever since then this had happened often, he had found himself been drawn into Phoebe. The same was happening to her.

She stopped, the pain, the tears it all stopped...at one point she thought that her heart had stopped as she looked at him. "I...I think some where, some where inside I wanted it to end. It was too much; I knew that he was with someone else...I just..."

Rick lifted up his hand and as it touched her skin on the side of her face, as his hand touched her skin she fell silent. They just looked into each others eyes for what felt like a lifetime, it was something passed between them. Phoebe lifted a hand and placed it on his chest. He moved his thumb under her eye and wiped away the tear.

"I'm sorry" He whispered,

"What, sorry he slept with another woman and hurt me or sorry it's over between us?" She was so serious; she didn't have sadness in her eyes any longer she had confusion and something else...love.

"Sorry he hurt you. But I am not sorry that it is over...he treated you like you were nothing Phoebe...he didn't deserve you...you are too good for him" he spoke softly,

"What about you? Am I too good for you?" She asked, also quietly. Both were intoxicated by each other, unable to pull away. This time it was too much.

"Yes, you are...you're too good for anyone Pheebs... depends if you trust me? If you think I am good enough for you?" Now they were inches apart from each other. His hand on her face, her hand on his chest...looking into each others eyes, there was something there, something deep there...there was...

"RICK" A voice bellowed through the manor from the bottom of the stairs. Rick stepped back from Phoebe as if been broken from a trance, he lost his trail of thought and his head was all over the place much like hers. What ever it was between them was intoxicating.

"Err...y...yeah!" HE called back still looking into Phoebe's eyes, deep into them.

"Rick, can you come down here and help me bring the shopping in?" Piper called,

"Err...I, yeah I'll be right down, just a sec..." He called back, then he looked at Phoebe again, neither spoke not a word, just looked at each other then he turned around and headed down the stairs of the manor. Phoebe watched him leave, watched him walk away and sighed. She pushed her hands through her hair and walked into the bathroom.

-----------------------------

The sun was setting in San Francisco, and the reddened sky highlighted the land. Piper was taking two more bags from the car when she saw Rick running down the steps, bear feet, bear backed just his worn jeans and belt. "Catch you at a bad time?" she joked as he passed her by. "I swear to god, you better have just had a shower and if it was anything else you better not have done it on my bed."

Rick smiled, taking the three last bags of shopping he slammed the boot to the car and looked at her, "You are one sick lady Pipe, I had a shower...that's all. And now I wish that I hadn't cooked you lot dinner...I'm not appreciated." He smiled

"Hay, I'm only messing you know that. So how was your day?"

'well apart from the last ten, fifteen minuets normal' s mind screamed, "Okay" He spoke, "You?"

"Well could have been worse, Rick I wanted to ask you something...are you still looking for a job?"

"Yeah, it hasn't been going to well though" He explained,

"Well I was just wondering, do you maybe want to work behind my bar, on the stage in P3. Just something to...keep, keep you going?"

"Piper, are you kidding that sounds great, thanks you." He beamed, "I'd hug you but it'll have to wait till I put these down"

"It's no problem" She smiled, "Come on lets go put these away." With this they both headed into the manor.

--------------------------------

That night those in the manor had just finished up with the meal that Rick had cooked, they were sat at the table plates in front of them empty.

"Well Piper looks like you have some competition" Paige spoke as she lent back on the chair.

"Yeah tell me about it, that was great Rick" Rick was somewhere else as was Phoebe who was sat in front of him, both staring at their plates, "you guys is everything okay...you have hardly spoken all night. Rick Phoebe?" Piper asked

"Oh...err...yeah, I'm good. Just...a bit tired that's all" He lied really he was thinking about Phoebe, about earlier that day. About earlier through the months they first met.

"Yeah I'm fine" Phoebe added,

she looked up and caught eye contact with him, they held if for a second the Rick broke it, "Now you four go, sit down stick on the fire and rest...I am going to clean this lot up"

"No Rick, look you have cooked it us and all that...you go and rest I'll..."

"Prue I said rest, relax... just do anything but lift a finger to help me that goes for you all"

"Who are we to argue" Paige said putting her hands up, "I'm off, thanks for this Rick" She smiled at him across the table. Then stood up

"Are you sure?" Piper asked

"Yes I am, now go..." He smiled, Piper and Prue then both stood, "Thanks Rick" Prue called

"No problem..." He called back,

"Pheebs are you coming?" Piper asked,

Phoebe and Rick shared another look and then she stood up and followed "Yeah" and with that he began to tide up.

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An hour had past; Phoebe was lost in her thoughts. She hared as Piper, Prue and Paige spoke but didn't listen it was just there distant voices that she hared. She couldn't stop thinking about him, over and over it replayed...earlier that day.

Standing to her feet Phoebe walked towards the door, "Pheebs, you okay?" Paige asked, "What's he done now?" She asked, referring to her brother's latest antics. His practical jokes were not uncommon on a regular basis.

"Err...no...erm...nothing...I just...tired I think I just need to go up to bed" The three sisters accepted this as an answer and watched as Phoebe walked away.

She was stood in the doorway of the kitchen watching as he stood, drying up the dishes that he just washed, she watched him for a few minuets before preceding up the stairs of the manor and to her room.

-----------------------------------

Walking slowly down the steps of the manor, Phoebe came to the bottom stood in the foyer she continued towards where the living room was; as she looked in she was relived to find that the moonlight fell upon a figure that of the person she hoped. Not saying a word she walked over and sat next to him softly. He opened his eyes when he felt the weight shift on the sofa. That's when he saw her, sat the moonlights silver glow catching her features he instantly woke up, "Phoe..."

She stopped him from speaking, "Yes I do and yes you are" She spoke softly, he looked perplexed, she answered his silent question, "Rick, I do trust you and I think that you are too good for me."

Once again he was overcome with the same feeling of been totally intoxicated this time he was unable to stop himself. Both moved towards each other and their lips met. Softly, they kissed. Emotion and feelings so strong it was over powering. After a lengthy kiss they pulled apart, they looked into each others eyes for the longest of times. He moved his hand down her shoulder and onto her waist. Pulling back the covers he guided her to lie down and he put his arm around her. Her head was rested on his shoulder as he put the blanket back over them. Not a word was spoken apart from that of Phoebe's whisper as both drifted of to sleep, "I trust you!" In response he pulled her closer and put his free arm across her stomach, both hers rested against his chest they fell asleep in each others arms, so close...so comforted. Feeling complete.


	16. is there?

**Well it looks like i'm on a role...**

C.C. - thanks as always love the reviews i get. And what can i say...love is blinding, Rick's in for a hard few months. ANd Phoebe well, she always gets the guy! And usually always blows it. Just have to see how this works out. lol. Personally i can not wait for Prue to find out about them?!? think of the fun. lol

thanks for all the reviews that i recive off you. YOu r my hero. Keep sweet DUDE! - speak soon. TOTEM

Succubus-69 - thanks alot for the reviews!!! i really apretiate them and i'm glad you like the fic i'll try and post more often. Thanks for the patients. Sorry i have not replied to those prior i got a bit caught up in my hectic life but i really apriciate them all. Thank you for sticking with this fic even if it does take a chunk of time and a half for meto update. Keep cool dude TOTEM

evil-paige - thanks alot glad you like it and yup...i'm actually having a lot of fun writing for RIck! He's like a member of my fictional family now lol. thanks again and keep reading.

I love to get Reviews from you guys who have read it because it helps me understand if i'm on the right track with the fic and even get some ideas and find out what you want and like. Thanks again to all you guys and if i have missed anyone out i am really sorry...i thank you all as well. Enjoy the next Chapter...TOTEM

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**Oh Brother – ...is there?**

He had been awake now for the last hour and a half, unable to sleep just there. He was looking at the woman that lay in his arms and for some reason, he felt a little odd. Not because there was anything wrong with this but, he kept thinking of Paige, I mean sure he had gone out with her friends before, more than once but this, him and Phoebe, were totally different. It was Paige's sister and he was Paige's brother. For her this would be totally wired and to be honest he had become accustom to having this family now. He actually loved it. If something went wrong, got complicated then...he'd lose it all.

Softly he moved the hair out of Phoebe's face and looked at her. So lovingly he watched over her as she slept, it was true since the first time she had pulled him away from the fight with Prue, when they talked in the garden, he felt something really strong. Now both were accepting it hard as it may be. Neither wanted to endanger what it was they had now but it was too strong to keep on ignoring. He couldn't treat her as a sister, and as that day proved found it ha,rd to treat her like a friend.

His mind was running a thousand miles, he needed to get out of there, think, try and understand what it was he was feeling. He had never felt this strong before about another person. Slowly ever so slowly so not to wake her up he pushed back the cover, rose himself from the sofa and stepped over the back of the sofa. Phoebe stirred slightly when he finally made it to the floor but then she settled back into sleep. Throwing on his cloths that were placed over the back of the sofa he took of towards the kitchen. Taking his guitar from where it was lent against the wall in the kitchen he left. At this early hour of six o'clock it was still dark, the sun only just starting to break through.

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Paige fully dressed came tumbling down the stairs, two at a time. A smile plastered on her face and a sparkle in her eye. Everything was okay, for a long time in ages it was simple again, her life. Well except the demonic factor but...oh well. Every time she thought of magic and demonic attacks she felt guilt and anger wash over her that she had not told Rick yet, but today she pushed it away, today nothing was going to stop her from been happy.

Walking into the kitchen she saw her sister sat over on the breakfast table, she had one foot on the chair pulled into her chest and her head rested on her arm. "Hay, Pheebs morning" Paige beamed,

"Sadly yes it is" Paige picked up something in her voice, sadness.

The youngest walked over and poured two mugs of coffee, then she walked over to the table and placed them down taking a seat pushing one in front of Phoebe. "Look like you needed it. Want to talk dude?" She asked

Phoebe took the coffee then looked up at Paige, 'yeah sure I do, I think I'm in love with your brother' He mind ran over, "Just a bad night and day actually. I broke up with Jason yesterday..."

"What! You and Jason but you were in love with each other?" Paige was genuinely shocked. She thought beyond a doubt that these two were right for each other.

"Yeah well apparently he either also loved his secretary or got very lonely in Hong Kong!" Phoebe spat in disgust, she had been faithful through out there relationship he however obviously thought less of what they had. 

"NO! He slept with her?" Paige asked, Phoebe nodded and took a sip of her coffee, "How did you find out?"

"He told me, I was at work yesterday and he called from Hong Kong, told me 't keep living like this been so far apart. He admitted he cheated on me and then said the my Job was still there and it wouldn't be effected. He's going to stay in Hong Kong for a few months let it settle down between us. He broke up with me over the phone while I was sat in a busy office" Phoebe explained, sure this was what she was angry at and yesterday yes this was the reason the she was upset. But seen as Paige knew there was something wrong and Phoebe couldn't tell her about the whole, I love your brother thing, this would have to do. Truthfully, she didn't love Jason anymore, not after what he had done, how could she.

"I do not believe him what a loser. Are you okay honey?" Paige asked, concerned for her sister

"I will be, truth is, right now I'm more hurt and angry at myself for letting someone hurt me again. After Cole I promised that I would not let it happen and it did. Maybe between us what I was afraid of was what happened. At some point I know he loved me but, I was just there to keep him company on those lonely nights in San Francisco. Face it he played me Paige, I bet he has got one in every country and every paper. A loser who lets him take her for a ride."

"Oh honey, look our not a loser. You trusted him and he hurt you. I know how it feels but do not blame yourself. He is the loser...not you."

"Honestly, I do not love him...I hadn't in a long time. Things were too, it was just sex to him. The 48 hour visits, the presents, the hotel sweets it was all a lie. And I lived it for the longest of times. I'm just angry at my self and him for playing me but I do not love him. Not now. At one point yes I did, but not now." Phoebe explained

"Are you okay though, I mean...how are you holding up"

"Considering, pretty good. Thanks for the talk Paige it really helped the whole...what a loser gig...always helps"

"Yeah well, sisters job and hay, he is a loser and you deserve better" Paige stood up and kissed her sister on the forehead, "Have a good day Pheebs, forget about him...and if you ever need to talk again I'm here for you and if you want me to hurt him, also here for you. Accept in the next few hour, case review so I'll be off." The youngest downed her last gulp off coffee and started for the back door, "And if Piper asks I ate okay?"

"Only if you promise to grab something on the way"

"Already on it! Thanks" Paige called, then as she turned to pull open the kitchen door she was beat to it as Rick pushed it open. "Hay you, good morning. Where have you been?"

"Hay, morning P. I was just at the beach, music, sun rise, needed to think" He explained. Paige nodded. "Well do not think too much we can not have you injuring yourself. And will you be here tonight or what?!

"I'm, err, not sure" He answered

"Well, if not I'll give you a call... if so see you later. Bye Pheebs" She called.

"Bye" Phoebe spoke, and then she looked down at the coffee mug on the table. Rick turned and looked over at her, he noticed she didn't look too happy, he was about to say something but she beat him to it. "You, left early..."

Rick nodded, "Yeah, sorry about that just needed to think...get out for a few hours and really think."

"About?" Phoebe asked now for the first time looking into his eyes,

"About us. You and me...about yesterday"

"So, can you answer a question...is there?" Phoebe spoke looking deep into his eyes,

"IS there what?" HE asked,

"An us, a you and me? Look Rick I have feelings for you that go beyond friend ship but I understand that this will be tough, hard on everyone so if you want to leave it...keep on been friends..."

"We tried it Phoebe, we tried the sister thing, the friend thing and it is not working...we wont be fiends because I have feelings that are so strong for you. Last night I just held you Phoebe and that was the best thing in the world to me. I just can not endanger this what I have between, P, and Prue and Pipe. I have been thinking a lot and I'll give it a shot, I really want you Phoebe...but we have to take it slow...don't mess it up and lose what we have. I'll lose everything. But with the way that I feel about you, it's a risk I am prepared to take." He spoke softly, he had made his way to the table and was no crouched down next to Phoebe.

She looked at him, again she was overcome with the feeling of love, wanting him and needing to be with him, "there is an us then?" She asked, "Because Rick, I do not want you to think that you are just rebound guy...I have felt like this for a long time now...I can not ignore it anymore. Last night when I was in your arms I felt something, safe, Loved. I want to give it a shot, and I want it to work"

Rick took her hand in his and moved forward kissing her softly there lips met and she mover her one hand to his cheek as there kiss got more passionate. When he pulled back he whispered, "I'm glad that's how you feel, you know with the whole not been able to ignore it because I can't pretend it's not there."

Phoebe kissed him again, then whispered, "Lets keep this between us for now, we can not blow it Rick...we have to make it work."

He nodded and hugged her, kissing her quickly one last time he stood up and walked over to the counter grabbing his guitar he jumped up onto the breakfast bar with his foot rested on a stool. As if on cue then the kitchen started to fill up.

"Hay guys, morning" Piper called, as she walked in holding Leo's hand,

"Morning Piper, Leo" Rick called,

"Morning" Phoebe also spoke

"Morning guys" Leo added

Rick began to strum away then something hit him, "Hay Leo, where did you come from man I didn't hear you come in." over the past weeks Leo and Rick had also gotten to know each other. Rick knew Leo worked away a lot.

"I err, came back really late. Quiet so I didn't wake anyone up" Leo explained, then he walked over to the fridge and took out a bottle of orange out. Lame much, he thought, well what was he supposed to say 'yeah I orbed into my Wife during the night' He sighed the placed the orange on the counter as Piper started to make breakfast.

Rick glance over at Phoebe every so often while strumming away. Leo and Piper were too pre occupied to notice the way that they were looking at each other with such love. Phoebe had not felt like this in a long time, and sure both he and herself were going to have to be careful not to ruin this but, right now it was perfect.


	17. unbearable unbreakable

**Succubus-69** – hay there. As always thanks for the reviews. I really appreciate it and yup...I liked the Phoebe/Paige thing. In the show I think there aren't enough sisters bonding moments going on. Oh well I suppose I'll have to create them myself lol. Anyway thanks for the patients of my posts and tell me what you think.

**CC McKenna** – Thanks CC, again I love receiving reviews from you. They totally help, and I think my muse likes them to. LOL. And hay, what's a Totem Fic without a good old argument, fists a flying and full on raw emotion thrown in. It shouldn't be too long till we get to that either. Hope you like this chap, thanks again TOTEM.

**triquetraperson** – Thanks a lot for the heads up, I try and sort the whole name thing out. Sorry about that. I don't know where my head was. Glad you like the fic as well...keep reading and reviewing. Thanks again.

**evil-paige** – thanks for the review. Glad that you like.

Thanks also to anyone that I have failed to mention, and also to the guys out there who are reading this and not reviewing.

**Read and enjoy.** Thanks

**Oh Brother -  
(unbearable/unbreakable)**

The Rain lashed down onto the road, and the storm continued strong. Thunder clapped as sheet lightening lit up San Francisco. He had found himself, lately for some reason doing this more and more often. Walking down the streets alone, thinking and wondering. About Paige, about Phoebe, about it all, the life he had made so complicated.

He had been with Phoebe now for a good three weeks. Things were great when they were alone, but when he was with the whole lot of them he felt bad, bad for keeping it from Paige, bad for having to pretend when he was around Phoebe and worse when he had to act like she was a friend. It tore him apart. Something he had never felt before though was how he felt for Phoebe. There was something about the way she'd light up the room with a smile, make him feel loved by simply taking hold of his hand, make him feel whole with just a moment of there lips touching.

Right now he wished he was with her, holding her close to him instead he was walking through the streets of San Francisco towards the manor. Sure she'd be there but it wouldn't be able to be Phoebe and Rick, it would be something else. It was really difficult to sit and act like there relationship was nothing especially when it meant so much to him.

Then there was Paige, god knows how she would take this, the whole I'm sleeping with your sister who I love like know one else before. No way was this going to go down well. Then after Paige there was Prue and Piper, how would they take it, Prue would have some problem with it of that he was sure. They had accepted him as a friend and brother but anything more would certainly piss of the oldest and probably hurt Paige.

Another clap of thunder shook the city, he wrapped his brown leather tighter around his soaked form. He must have been crazy, what the hell made him take a walk when the storm clouds were visible. But three and a half hours ago he was not thinking about that, he was pissed that Phoebe had totally passed off the fact that there was a problem with them and told him that they would talk later. He just ripped his jacket from the side and left the manor. She had tried to call him more than once but he was to irritated to talk, when he wanted to talk to her she had dismissed the whole thing he sure as hell wasn't going to answer the Phone. Because he had left in such a rush though his keys to his apartment were at the manor, so he had to go back.

Sometimes he wished it was how it used to be, him and Paige and he had met Phoebe as Paige's friend maybe? It would have been easier and he would have known where he stood with that. In the past three weeks he and Phoebe had been together for only a fraction of the time he would have liked, together as a couple that was. There were so many interrupted convocations, so many kisses cut short, and dreams untold. He resented that. That he couldn't be open with his feelings, had to hide it all. It was deep, the love he had for Phoebe there for it was hard to hide. When she would walk in from work he wanted to greet her by throwing his arms around her and kissing her but he had to wait, until they were alone or could steel a moment together. He resented it.

--------

Paige walked in from the kitchen to the living room. She saw Phoebe sat there, knees pulled to her chest pillow clutched tight to her. "Hay dude, you okay?" She asked.

Phoebe was pulled from her thoughts as she hared Paige's voice, she just looked in her direction, "Yeah" She managed,

"Yeah, you really look it. Want to talk about it?" Paige asked taking a seat right next to her sister.

"Not really" Phoebe spoke,

"Well too bad. By the looks of it, you have guy trouble" Paige took a shot

"How did you get that from, not really?" Phoebe asked

"The way you're sat, Who ever it is you miss him"

"Well you are not wrong" Phoebe couldn't hold up anymore and Paige had hit the sot she did miss him, when Rick wasn't by her, when she wasn't in his arms she did miss him. More than she ever thought possible. She knew this whole relationship would be hard but she never imagined just how hard exactly. Having to hide from her sisters and pretend to the man she loved they were nothing more that friends was so hard. It was practically unbearable.

"So it is a guy and you miss him. It's not Jason so who?"

Phoebe was forced to lie again to keep this from Paige, "Just...a guy" It hurt to say that because Rick was way more than just a guy. So much more than just a guy

"Well obviously he's some guy to do this to you but I see you don't want to talk about it so how about I change the subject?"

Phoebe was slightly relived, "Be my guest" She answered,

"You don't know what Rick went do you?"

So much for subject changing, phoebe thought, sighing she answered, "No sorry"

Paige looked at Phoebe funny, "Is something going on with you two?"

Yeah I'm sleeping with him and we had a fight he walked out... "No what would be going on?"

"I don't know, I mean has he said something to upset you. About me, this family...about you know...you not growing up with me or anything?"

"Paige, look Rick hasn't said anything to me"

'that's the problem' she silently added,

"you sure he hasn't pissed you off. He can be a real jerk sometimes." Paige asked worried.

"Nope, he hasn't said anything! It's just me been my moody self. I'm fine"

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I am." Phoebe gave Paige a reassuring smile, "I think that I'm going to lie down for a while. Call me for dinner?" She asked

"Sure honey. Hope you feel better later on"

Phoebe stood up from the chair and put the pillow back, "Thanks!" With this she walked out the room. Paige sighed.

------

Upstairs Phoebe was now lay on her bed, only a few nights ago she was lay here with him. Rick was next to he. They had talked as if a normal couple. She missed not been able to do that all the time. Lie in his arms and just be with him. As she thought about the times with him, those without him, those she needed him...like now. She hated when they fought.

All be it wasn't often this been only there second time it still pissed her off. Since she was young she had never really known when to believe a guy truly loved her but with Rick that was all different, she was sure he felt for her what she felt for him.

She was lay on her bed, for a good hour when she hared someone walking up the corridor. Then she hared her door open. Looking across she saw him stood in the door way. He was drenched, his hair, face, jacket, jacket, jeans...

He turned around to make sure that nobody had seen him come in then he shut the door, turning around he looked at her, "Where did you go?" She asked, 

"Out, I just...walked around. Thinking?"

"About?" Phoebe prompted,

"Us? This relationship is so hard! I just wanted to take a break. I walked up to the beach, around there and walked back." He moved forward, "Phoebe I do not like fighting with you, I'm sorry I think that maybe I was out of order! I just got really stressed knowing that you were so close to me and I couldn't be with you." He was babbling now, all his emotions flooded out.

Phoebe stood to her feet and walked over, she looked into his eyes, "I don't like this anymore than you. You really think that I like having to hide my feelings in front of people. It's hard and it pisses me of. But I can't, fucking change it Rick. This is how it is. We both knew it and we can't do anything about it. I love you, more than I have anyone else...but it's not just us Rick. We have t think about Paige. She's not going to take this well is she. We both know it." Phoebe said, her voice clearly angered but in a low volume.

"Just, I want to spend more time with you Phoebe."

"Well maybe we should then...I have the next two days off work. How about we spend the weekend together?"

"I'd like that. A lot." He confessed, "I'm sorry about how I acted, earlier..." Phoebe put her hand on his lips to hush him, and then she lent up taking hold of his wet cloths and kissed him passionately, he complied by pulling her close, a hand on the side of her face.

When she pulled back he sighed, "I love you..."

"I love you to. Lets forget about today...just promise next time that you walk out of here you tell me where you are going. I was really worried."

"I promise" He spoke, leaning forward he kissed her again.

Only a small kiss, then she pulled back taking of his jacket she smiled, "go get a shower, and changed. And tonight we get the manor to ourselves because there off to P3, I'm not feeling too good, and you babe are very tired."

"I am, am I?" He asked,

"You are." She spoke, "I love you"

Rick smiled, "I love you to." With this he turned and opened the door, walking off Phoebe had a smile on her face as she lay back down on her bed. God how she loved him. Hopefully things between them would get easier. She could only hope that they never got worse.

There love although Unbearable was unbreakable.


	18. a bad day

**a bad day**

**Hey guys, i know it's been the longest of times since i posted any of this, but here we go better late than never. The next part is only short. My muse is starting of slow and working her way up. i'm fighting threw the righters block - so i'm hoping this will improve with time. I HOPE!**

**Thanks for reading guys - and too all of you who have reviewed in prior chapters THANKYOU! Hope you continue to tell me what you think and throw in any ideas.**

**And C.C i know this** **has been real long wait but thanks for sticking with -Here is chapter (a bad day) Like i said only short but hope to have more soon. Hope your well TOTEM**

a bad day

"RICK? You here?" Paige called as she pushed her hands into the back pockets of her jeans walking threw the manor. Paige walked into the kitchen still waiting for an answer but received silence. Then that's when she stood, over near the windows on the patio door. She looked out to see Rick sitting with Phoebe on the wall out there. She was about to go out until she saw something that stopped her.

He moved his hand over Phoebe's leg as the two smiled into each other, "Last night was great…" He spoke.

"Glad you thought so…how about we make it a weekend next time?" Phoebe asked as she moved her hand to his face, as she wiped away lipstick which she must have gotten there earlier.

"Maybe" He nodded, as he put an arm around Phoebe's back, she wrapped hers around his neck and the two kissed, passionately. He ran a hand through her hair and then down her back.

Paige's eyes widened, she watched as her brother and her sister made out, all over each other. She turned speechless and walked back out of the manor in shock. She walked down the steps and took off in her car. She put her foot down, this was all way to messed up. Her sister and her brother, what the hell were they both thinking? Paige didn't understand…

Phoebe and Rick were in the kitchen, he was stood at the cooker and she was stood behind him her arms wrapped around his waist as he threw the chopped onions into the pot of pasta sauce he was cooking. He stirred it around with the wooden spoon. "Smells great" She added, "I think Pipe has some competition."

Rick smiled, "Umm, I don't think so…your sisters the ultimate of cooks" He took some of the sauce out on the spoon and then he turned to face Phoebe who was now stood her body pressed against him. "Here see what you think" She lent forward and ate some sauce off the spoon.

"That's great" She smiled as she then lent up to press her lips against his

"So was that…" He smiled at her when the two pulled apart, turning around he placed the lid on the pan and let it bubble away. He turned back and wrapped his own arms around her waist. "how about we go into the living room…this won't be done for a while"

She looked at him with such desire and need, "Sounds great except they could walk in at any time" She explained.

He nodded, "Umm…" Leaning towards her their lips once again met, "I know and...what can…I say…I like the sense of…Danger" He explained in between kisses, as he ran his hand softly up her back.

"Wait…what about…Paige?" Phoebe asked, "She can't find out…not like this anyway" Phoebe said pushing him back slightly.

"What about if we go upstairs then? Please…" He asked as he pulled at her shirt, she smiled he was cute when he begged.

"No, besides…I skip work to spend the day with you…I need to get something in soon" She explained, "I need to go and do some work before they send the paper off to the printers."

"How about I help you then?" He asked, wanting to spend as much time as he could with her. "I'm a pretty good advice giver."

"Oh yeah?" Phoebe asked him with a smiled

"Yeah" He replied confidently,

"Well, what advice would you give to a sister who is sleeping with her other sisters brother behind her back?" Phoebe asked him, Phoebe really was feeling guilty about this as was Rick.

He backed away from Phoebe a bit, "I'm thinking about telling her…what's the worst she can do?" He asked, he pushed his hand threw his hair. "I came here ready to see my sister I didn't know she'd have this new set up…then, I wanted to hate you all so much. I hated you all…" He turned his back on her, then after a few silent seconds he turned back. "I love you Phoebe…"

She smiled and moved towards him, "I love you to Rick" She wrapped her arms back around him, "Love you so much" She just hugged him in the silence of the kitchen, until they hard the front door open. They jumped apart – waiting for the voice of one of the sisters to fill the manor it never did. They just listened as who ever had entered walked up the stairs. Phoebe and Rick headed into the foyer to see that Paig'e keys were on the side.

"She must have had a bad day…" Phoebe said,

"Yeah she must have…I'll go up and see if she's okay" He explained, he turned to go up the stairs but Phoebe stopped him,

"Rick, wait…" She moved forward and whipped away lipstick from his lips and cheek. "Make sure she's okay" He nodded and headed up the stairs.

Next part soon i hop - please tell me what you think and any ideas are welcome! thanks for reading


	19. Girlfriend

**Thanks for the reviews guys and soooo sorry that this is taking so long to update. hope to give you more soon :) **

**Girlfriend **

"So how is she?" Phoebe asked as she swung around to see a confused looking Rick,

"She's…I don't know she threw a folder at me, shouted a lot…pushed me out her room and shut the door. Something's not right about that girl…I swear to god she was dropped on her head as a child" Rick mumbled as he walked over to the fridge and took out an ice pack pressing it against his head where Phoebe assumed the folder had hit him.

"Maybe I should…"

"If I were you…stay as far away as possible…she's violent, she needs to be quarantined" he moaned. Phoebe walked forward and took the ice pack from him and placed it against his head, "Oh, is Ricky hurt?" She asked in a baby voice, "Did lil' sister beat you up?"

"Hey she was angry – I bet Richard did something" Rick shot, "You got his number?"

"Rick you can not go calling her boyfriend and shouting your mouth off" Phoebe growled, "What the hells got into you?"

"I don't like to see P hurt?"

"What did she say to you exactly?" Phoebe asked "And by the way you are after sympathy with this thing on your head there is nothing there" She shot as she took the ice pack away"

"Internal bleeding" Rick flashed a grin then he walked over and sat on the counter top Phoebe took a seat on the stool next to him. He turned serious, "I went up there and walked into the room, asked her if everything was okay she told me she had a bad day with work. I sat down started to try and talk and she lost it" He explained.

"She's probably had a bad day, some of the stuff she works with I mean…she'll be okay later on" phoebe sounded confident of this.

The back door opened, "Hey guys" Prue said walking into the kitchen, although Phoebe and Rick were not in anyway too close to each other on instinct she stood up and walked away further as Rick just sat there. "Hi Prue" Phoebe greeted

"Her Prue" Rick also smiled,

"Wow something smells good" The oldest sister smiled as she shut the door and put all her stuff on the table.

"Hope your hungry" Rick said to her

"Starving" She smiled back, "What have you been doing today then?" She asked him

"Not a hell of a lot…" He explained, "Oh and heads up Paige is feeling violent tonight so watch your back" HE warned.

"Huh?" Prue asked

"Oh my god, Paige threw a folder at him, not exactly screaming serial killer is it" Phoebe shot with a smile, "She a little pissed I think she had a bad day" Phoebe explained. Prue nodded her head, then she turned to them both, "I'm going to grab a shower then, won't be long"

Prue walked along the corridor and stopped at the door of the youngest, she knocked, "RICK I swear to go if that's you…"

"No it me…can I come in?" Prue asked

"Yeah" Paige answered

Prue pushed the door open and walked in, "Hey, I hared you hit Rick" Prue said "what'd he do now?"

"It doesn't matter…I just had a really bad day" Paige said standing up from where she was sat on her bed looking at old Photos. Prue sat on the bed and picked up a few looking at them. "Wow, lil' Rick huh? How old were you here?" Prue asked looking at a Photo of Rick and Paige at on Christmas.

"I'm six" She explained, "Things were simple then huh?" Paige asked

"And they aren't now?" Prue asked looking over to Paige who was now lent against the wall.

"Prue, I live with my sisters who I was separated from at birth, I'm all magical and what have you and my brother is…" She was about to say the words, 'Shaking up with my sister' but decided not to, "My brother knows nothing about magic or any of that shit. No way is this simple" Paige explained,

"Do you think you should tell him?" Prue said, "I mean what if something happens?"

"I can't, not yet" Paige explained, "I'm going to go and see Richard – I'll see you later"

"You sure your okay…"

"After the day I've had it'll be a while before it's okay" She explained

"Well look after yourself"

"Will do" With this Paige left the bed room and walked down the stairs.

She got to the bottom only to find that her keys had been moved, "KEYS! Where the hell are they?" She shouted

"Looking for these?"

Paige looked up to see Rick lent into the door frame holding the keys, "Rick don't fuck about…give me the keys" She growled

"IF you tell me what's wrong" He shot.

"Rick, give me my keys…Why do you always do this…I don't want to talk about it" she shouted.

"We never keep stuff from each other"

"You sure about that?" Paige shot,

"Why do I get the feeling it's something that I've done?" He asked

"Just leave it"

"P…STOP FUCKLING ABOUT AND TELL ME!" He shouted pure anger this time that brought Phoebe to the foyer.

"Guys what's…" Before she could finish Paige swung around.

"Stay out of it" She growled

"Oh so it's Phoebe's fault too?" Rick asked

"Rick you don't want to do this trust me"

"Oh I do…" Rick said

"Give me the keys"

"Tell me what's wrong…or I'm going to…"

"To what?" Paige asked, "What the hell are you going to do?"

The door to the manor opened and Piper stepped in, "Guys what's up in here?" She asked

Paige swung around, "Piper I need your keys"

"Don't give her them" Rick shouted, Piper had never seen this anger in both Paige and Rick, "I've done something…I get that but I want to know what"

"Paige, Rick calm down" Phoebe spoke

"I told you to stay out of it" Paige shot back,

"stop talking to her like that"

"Why, you trying to protect you GIRLFRIEND?" Paige screamed

Silence fell over the manor, Piper in shock at the front door. Phoebe stood in the centre of the foyer in disbelief, Prue halfway down the stairs and Rick and Paige standing head to head. "P…" His voice softened, as he took a step back.

"Don't P me..." She shot, "I don't want to hear it okay…just leave it"

"I didn't want "I just this to happen…you weren't meant to find out like this" He said, "I wanted to tell you…but I knew you'd react like this"

"Like what? THIS?" She said as she got in his face, wanted my keys, I was going to let the two of you get on with it…"

"Paige I'm so …" Phoebe started

"Don't say sorry! Don't…"

"I am really sorry you found out like this" Paige shook her head then she looked up at Rick, "KEYS" she said

"I don't think you should Drive like this" HE said

"GIVE ME THE FUCKING KEYS" She screamed,

Rick did pass her the keys, "Don't do anything stupid" Paige just shook her head an walked from the manor leaving the others standing there.

**thanks for reading : ) R&R **


	20. dealing or not

**Dealing … or not!**

"You know what we should have just told her" Rick shouted as he paced back and forth the living room, he hadn't ever wanted to hurt Paige, he loved her – and he knew that this was anything but the way he had wanted it to turn out.

"Yeah well it's too late now" Phoebe shot back, just as frustrated. "she hates us"

"Fuck" He growled, he walked straight passed where she was sat, where the woman he loved was and towards the front of the door.

"Rick, where are you going…don't walk away" Phoebe said standing up, "Your not leaving me to deal with this"

"Phoebe, she knows…P knows! You think she's coming back here?" He bellowed, "She doesn't want to see either of us right now and even more than she wants to see either of us she sure as hell don't want to see us together" he was shouting at her as if she was stupid, as if she couldn't see this.

"You think I don't see that…I'm just as pissed she found out like this. I never wanted it to end up like it has" Phoebe shot back, "I've never seen her that hurt and it kills me to think I did it to her"

"WE" he screamed, "WE DID IT TOO HER" he pushed his hand threw his hair and took a deep breath turning around he ripped his jacket from the hook.

"Where are you going?" She asked

"I'm getting out of here" He shot back before throwing open the door and then slamming it shut. Leaving Phoebe stood in the foyer. She wrapped her arms around her waist – she couldn't believe this…she walked into the kitchen slowly not knowing what to do. She'd hurt Paige bad.

--------

Paige drove, the car driving faster picking up speed. She pushed the gears to the limit; pushed her foot to the floor…it was as if a release for all her anger. She hadn't known just what had hurt her most that they had done this behind her back or that they had done it right in front of her- In her home. It hurt watching them …

She just kept her foot to the floor…so many different kinds of emotions; she just wanted all this to be simple, to be easy – like when they were kids. She and Rick had been best friends she wasn't exactly sure where it was that had ended. They had all grown up and, sadly it seemed apart. How could she not have seen this…right there in front of her?

She just drove faster, with no destination just into the openness.

-------

"What the hell? How could you get involved with him – what was all this not complex enough?" Piper asked a little pissed as she walked in the kitchen and started to pace.

"Piper, look it's not like I meant for all this to happen it just did. I love him, and I'm sorry if that hurts you, or anyone else for that matter it's just how it is." Phoebe stood up from where she was sat…

"Yeah well it's hurt Paige" She shouted at her younger sister, "Jesus Phoebe you should have just walked away from this…I mean, it was already complicated enough"

"I can't help how I feel Piper…it's stronger than anything I've ever felt…you don't understand. If I could have, just walked away I would have but…I really do love him too much to just throw it away" Phoebe explained,

"Why didn't you talk to her…both of you should have before it got this far…FOR GOD SAKE PHOEBE. What happens if you two break up...is it not awkward enough for you?"

"What was I meant to say…err Paige do I have permission to sleep with your brother? … Come on Piper, it just happened. I didn't think oh how can I make the problems around here worse? Look, you don't think it killed me to keep this from her"

"Yeah well maybe you should have just come right out and said it" Piper explained, As Phoebe was there thinking, she came to the conclusion that maybe that would have been for the best.

-----

"Hey honey I was hoping you would stop by" Paige looked up from where she was stood at the door looking into his eyes, the eyes of the man she loved. "Is everything okay?" He noticed that something was off with her. Paige didn't speak, she just stepped forward and let him hold her, right now she was lost and confused she needed someone to just be strong for her, she rested her head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her waist, "Has something happened?" HE asked, getting overly concerned.

Paige looked up at him, and her lips slowly moved forward until she was kissing him softly. She wanted to know someone was here for her, she needed him to be here for her. He kissed her back until she softly pulled back. "Sorry it's late" She said, he sensed the pain in her voice.

"No problem…want to talk?" He asked as he guided her further into the house

"Not really…" She said taking a seat on the sofa, as he sat next to her. She turned to him "You're been straight with me right?" She asked.

Richard was actually kind of shocked by this, "Err, Paige?"

"I'm just…I don't need anymore secrets, just tell me there's nothing that I'm going to find out and hate you for is there?" Paige asked, actually fearing the answer.

Richard lent over and took her hand, his other moving to her wait as he sat close holding her. "Paige you know me…everything…I promise" He explained. "There is nothing you don't know"

Paige looked from his loving eyes to the floor, "I'm sorry" She apologized, "I just, I think I'm going mad" She explained.

"Paige, talk to me" He encouraged, "What's happened?"

------

Rick walked up threw the darkness, across the beach, he didn't know why he had turned up here but he had. It was seemingly empty there was nothing around him – he had been walking for a few minuets now having left his car on the road side. He couldn't believe this … how it had got to this. He knows full well that Paige was hurting, hurting bad and he was the cause if it. So many days when they were younger he had spent insuring Paige never got hurt like this, and now he was the one that had done it.

As he stood in the dark, he was alone until he felt a presence behind him. He turned just in time to see a guy stood behind him, the tall well built guy that seemed to tower him. Moments before he had been alone, no one around for as far as he could see, he really couldn't understand how this guy had gotten behind him so fast and without him knowing.

"Rick?" The man asked, "Rick Matthews"

"Who are you?" Rick asked

the reply was not one that he was expecting "its not who am I, it's what am I?"

**tbc….**

**Thank you all again so much for reading this**

**Please please tell me what you think : )**

**Thanks!**


	21. Should we be worried?

Not very long guys, real sorry about that. more soon i hope and thank you so much for reading :) if you have anything you want to ask or any ideas you want to throw out there all are welcome. thanks again! more soon i hope

**Should we be worried?**

"Umm, honey?" Richard out stretched his arm catching Paige's hand in his as she started to stand from the bed. "Where are you going babe?" He asked sleepily as he opened his eyes casting his gaze to her.

"I have to go…" She explained.

"It's half five in the morning Paige" Richard mumbled she looked down at him and even in the darkness of the room the moonlight that cast through the window highlighted the love that radiated from his gaze.

"Thank you" she spoke leaning over she ran her hand over his face and softly breathe a kiss onto his lips which he intensified. Mid kiss however she orbed out…when the blue lights faded he sighed and fell back onto the bed running his hand threw his hair.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She appeared in her bed room, it had been over a week since she had come home here and she wasn't ready to come back and everything to be okay. Though the next few moments told her that things in the Halliwell manor were never okay, as she heard a crash from beyond her door she instantly sprung into action pulling the door open, she looked to Prue who was on the floor with a gash above her head, without thinking she held her hand out and called for the energy ball that the demon flung her way. "Energy ball" She bellowed and then through it back at him. He screamed out in pain and then erupted from the inside out exploding into pieces. Once she was happy the immediate threat was over she moved to her sisters side just as the other Halliwell occupants started to emerge from there rooms.

"Hey sis, nice to see you" Prue said sitting up slowly with Paige's help.

"Yeah isn't it just" Paige said as she knelt by Prue's side, "You okay?" Prue just nodded, "Who was your friend?"

"What happened?" Piper asked, fear that her sister was hurt, "is everyone okay?"

"yeah thanks to supper witch over here" Prue smiled to her youngest sister.

Phoebe looked at Paige, the sister she hurt so bad. "You both okay?" She asked

Paige ignored the question but Prue didn't, "Yeah we are fine honey…" She stood up slowly with Paige's help, "Just a random attack that is now over so if you want to go back to your respective room it's fine by me"

"Are you kidding me…Prue, I need to take a look at your head" Piper shot

"And now I've saved your sorry ass" Paige said as she jabbed Prue playfully, "I'm going to bail"

"You two have a lot in common you know that" Phoebe shot before Paige could disappear back into her own room. "You're going to just pretend everything's okay?" Prue and Piper looked between Paige and Prue knowing that an argument was about to erupt.

"I'm not pretending…and it's not okay trust me" Paige spoke slowly her back still to her sister.

"Where is he?" Phoebe asked

"We bail Phoebe, after an argument we bail out on each other…it's what we do" Paige explained, "You want to find your… boyfriend try…but he won't be back till he's ready"

"You bail? That's your answer…we haven't hared anything from you in days Paige…for god sake how do we know you weren't lying in a ditch somewhere or some demon attacked." Phoebe shouted as she walked after Paige and grabbed her roughly by the arm pulling her around.

"You care?" Paige asked, pulling her arm free and looking at Phoebe who was now only inches in front of her.

"How can you ask that? Of cause I care. Why am I been blamed for this?" She shouted

"I never blamed you not once" Paige growled, "I don't want to do this with you" She explained.

"So what you just going to bail on us again?" Phoebe questioned, "I'm sorry I hurt you" She explained, "I never meant to do it…"

"Why are you explaining this to me" Paige screamed now losing it,

"Because I don't want you to hate me" Phoebe shouted in desperation.

"I don't hate you…" Paige said quietly as she turned her back on her sister and started to head for the stairs.

"Will you just shout at me, or do something?" Phoebe asked

Paige swung around, "You hurt me Phoebe, both of you. If you gave a damn what I thought then you would have told me and not hid it. You fucking hurt me…"

"You know what…we weren't the only ones keeping secrets from each other." Phoebe shot.

"Oh so you want to tell him you're a which now? GO AHEAD DO IT. I don't care what he thinks anymore"

"I'm just saying sometimes there's a reason we keep stuff from each other…this was that time. I just didn't want to hurt you"

"Hurt me, and this isn't hurting me. You two made an idiot out of me Phoebe. And all that time I never even knew…knew that you and him were"

"I love him Paige…and I love you. Why are you both doing this to me"

"We aren't doing it to you PHOEBE" Paige screamed, "This is what we do to each other…always have. Just let us both deal in our own way"

"and while your dealing what do I do?" She asked, "Because I could do with been told right now what you want from me"

"I don't want anything from you, just…sort this out with Rick Phoebe, not me." With this Paige just walked of down the stairs, Phoebe didn't follow though she just turned and walked back into her own room slamming the door.

Piper turned to Prue, "Don't you just love this family?"

"Who you going to take?" She asked

"I'll have Paige…" Piper spoke

"Phoebe it is then"

"Your head okay?"

"It'll be fine…" Prue put a reassuring hand on Piper's arm.

"Should we be worried?" Piper asked her oldest sister

"About my head?"

"No about our sisters?"

**tbc...**


	22. I know who you really are

Thankyou all sooooo much for the reviews they really do help and make writing worth it knowing that somone out there is reading lol. Like i said thanks, you guys are the best. Hope you like part 22. ;)

**Part 22 - I know who you really are **

Paige walked into the kitchen; things between her and Phoebe were still very bad and after the argument this morning the two had yet to speak. Now in the kitchen was Prue and Phoebe who were sat at the table and Piper lent on the counter top. "Hey work called you" Prue explained to Paige.

"What did they say?" She asked walking over to the fridge.

"Need to talk to you something about case reviews, and court files…" Prue explained.

"Well then, looks like they need me down there…too bad I can't stay here and bask in the beauty of what is a tense family get together." Phoebe tensed with the words spoken; Paige's sarcasm didn't go unmissed.

"Will you be back after work?" Piper asked,

"Not sure, I might just go straight on over to Richard's" Paige explained.

"I'm worried about him Paige…what if something happened?" Phoebe asked, turning to Paige.

"If something happened he'll call me and I'll have to go save his sorry ass…but you see he might call you" Paige explained, "Because you're his girl now" with this she lifted her phone up from the side and then lifted her folder of the table.

"How long are we going to keep this up?" Phoebe asked

"How long were you going to keep this from me?" Paige shot back, with a simple silence between the two Paige just nodded her head and started to leave.

"We were going to tell you"

"You know what, if you had I would have got over it…I mean hell it's nothing to do with who my brother sleeps with. But you lied to me, made me feel like an idiot…" Paige shouted, "I'm sick of been played Phoebe! You have no idea what I have been through and when you guys took me in I thought no one could hurt me again. No one would ever lie to me or hide shit from me. You were the one I trusted Phoebe…you hurt me"

"Something tells me I'm the hot topic of the day" Paige turned her head to see her brother stood in the doorway, as did the rest of them. "Miss me?" He asked with a smug grin spread over his face.

Paige just looked to Phoebe, "no need to worry now, lover boys home"

Phoebe stood to her feet, and looked to Rick. "Sorry I never called sooner, I was doing some stuff" Rick explained, he looked to Paige, "Couldn't help but over hear the last part of that conversation and just like to say, it was moving P…very moving"

"Are you drunk?" Paige shot

"No, you know when I'm drunk I'm the one beating the shit out of your ass hole boyfriends" He laughed, "What no hug and smiles to greet the long lost brother?" He asked Paige.

"Why don't you see what your girlfriends got for you?" Paige shot, "I'm late for a court case"

"your not going anywhere…" He shot, growled angrily. This put Prue and Piper on alert and Phoebe was shocked, still yet to speak. Rick grabbed Paige's arm as she tried to pass him, and pulled her back. "You know what you and me, we have a lot to talk about…we always avoid stuff…but I think we need to get everything out there in the open"

"You do huh? Rick let go of me…I have no idea what's gotten into you"

"You have – you really think I'm okay with the new family? The only reason I slept with that whore was to hurt you" He laughed

"You bastared" Phoebe spoke, so hurt.

"You can say what ever you like to me, your angry at me …don't start on Phoebe" Paige growled.

"You are sticking up for her now? We lied to you P…both of us. We were laughing behind your back. Laughing at you"

"You need to sober up"

"I'm not drunk Paige, but you where…the night mom and Dad died…you were drunk, and you now what all the times I said I didn't blame you…I LIED. I hate you for what you did P, you took away my mom and dad. You killed them…it's your fault." Paige dropped the folders that were in her arms to the floor and tried to pull her arm free.

"RICK" Prue growled, "What the fucks gotten into you" The oldest was getting defensive now.

"Into me? No Prue…this is what's always been here. Just I never told Paige because she can't handle it. I mean we don't want to send you crazy again do we" HE laughed, "Padded cell with the straight jacket on suicide alert. Too much?" Paige looked up at Rick, tears in her eyes – why was he doing this to her. "Oh P, I'm not the only one keeping secrets am I? they don't know you really do they?"

"Why?" Page asked, to hurt to voice much more, "Why did you…"

"I know who you really are Paige" HE whispered, then her put his hand around her throat and pulled her into him, "Call for your whit lighter now" He growled as he held his hand around Paige's neck tighter causing her to gasp for a breath. Prue, Piper and Phoebe all jumped forward but he pulled a blade out and held it to Paige. "I wouldn't even try it" He growled.

Paige tried to orb but couldn't, her powers were tied to her emotions and right now her emotions were a mess. "If you don't call him, she dies"

**---- Thanks! more soon i hope---**


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